Ask The Council

What will you ask Spirit?

Mending A Relationship

This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named A.

A: Dear Council. I’ve been in a committed relationship with my current partner for 10 years, and we have a family together. My partner is a wonderful man, and yet we’ve been in a place of deep struggle for years now.

Council: And that is part of choices that you’ve made, to have happy times, and to have periods of time where there is a struggle because you wish to learn from it. You want to see how you handle struggling, with kindness, with love, which is what we all planned to do when we decided to come into this reality. And so you are right on point.

A: There’s a big part of me that feels we have chosen to work this through and spend the remainder of our lives together. But I’m having a very difficult time even opening up to the idea that we can mend what we have, and give each other what we need and deserve.

Council: Oh, everything is mendable. All you have to do is remember (perhaps) getting together, [and] come up with the happy memories, [and] the happy feelings. And when you reach those feelings, you hold on to the happy feeling, and you bring it into what is happening in your life at this point. And so, when you truly want to mend it, you can.

A: To make matters more complicated, there is a man who is more than an acquaintance, but not someone I’m necessarily close with, who I cannot stop thinking about.

Council: And that is your problem. [Council laughs.] And how can you concentrate on giving everything into this relationship, no matter what is going on, to work it through, to make it happen, when there is someone else that you are attracted to? There’s someone else that you are thinking of. It is a choice you make to know how you feel about this other person, but to let that go if you truly want this to work with your husband. You concentrate on that. You put your focus on that. But when you keep thinking of someone else, and going to the thought of someone else, and you’re attracted, and maybe something can happen. It takes away from the mending and putting together the original relationship.

A: I can’t help but feel there is potential for something beautiful there. And I can’t figure out why, as we are not flirtatious, nor have any boundaries been even remotely crossed.

Council: So that is your imagination. That is the feeling that makes you feel better, feel good, that oh, there’s someone else, and maybe it could be better. That is what you are creating at this particular time.

A: I would like to know if you see a connection here, where it might come from, and what the agreement between us is in this lifetime.

Council: Where it comes from is the spirit world. And why it is here is because you agreed upon it, the two of you. He would come in, and you would be going through whatever choices of things that you are creating, and he would be a little diversion to make you feel better. He would put you in a place where you would think about this, learn from it, and feel what it is you truly want.

And not that there is something new that can happen. And of course it can if that’s what you really want. But he agreed to do this so that you would learn from it, from having this person in your life, of having the problem with your husband at the time, and what kind of decisions you would make. As a spirit, what would you choose to do? And that’s all it is. It’s something you agreed upon, that he would pop in at this particular time, and you would search yourself, who you are, what you want, and your choices.

A: I would also like to know what the agreement between myself and my current partner is because we love each other very much, and I know neither one of us want to see our family split apart.

Council: This is true, and you’ve had other past lives together, and this is something that you and him have agreed upon. Let’s have this struggle. Let’s see, as spirits, how do we handle it? Do we fall apart? Do we get mad? Do we blame each other? Do we withdraw? Or do we look for the love, keep looking for it, keep showing it? And that is all it is – an experience.

A: I know free will plays a role in all of this.

Council: Oh, definitely.

A: And nothing is that black or white, but I’m incredibly confused, and would greatly appreciate any insight. With sincere gratitude, A.

Council: Just remember, all three of you have chosen it – to come in together to, in your own ways, deal with it because you want to see how you would handle it. It is self-growth. You don’t have to be concerned with how your husband handles it, [or] how this other person handles it. All you have to be concerned about is, where are you? What are your choices? How are you handling it?

Listen to the entire 7-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for A and the rest of us, and let us know what you feel about it.

You can also ask The Council your own question by typing it into one of the Comment boxes that appear at the bottom of most of our blog pages, and we’ll publish an audio recording of their response as soon as it’s ready.

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March 12, 2026 Posted by | Agreement, Audio Content, Channeling, Choice, Feelings, Other Lifetimes, Questions & Answers, Relationships, Spirit, You Create Your Reality | , , , , , | Leave a comment