What’s Blocking My Having A Long-Term Relationship?
This post answers questions for The Council from an anonymous reader who’s looking for a long-term relationship.
Anon: I asked you about a long-term relationship in my future a while back and recently, after not focusing on relationships for a while, I tried to date again and met someone I thought had some potential. However, it’s been a very brief and confusing experience and they’ve decided to see someone else.
Council: So what have you found in this relationship that would bring you joy? What have you found that you can move on and find in another relationship? It’s always good to look for the experience and you’ll find in it things you want and things you don’t want.
And so we always say, before you look again, what have you learned? And what is the desire you want that you can create with the next person you bring into your reality?
Anon: I feel I understand the part I may have played in sabotaging things a bit, but I can also see that this person has baggage that makes us incompatible, at least for now.
Council: It’s good that you acknowledge this, but this baggage that you mention, it’s just experiences. It’s just beliefs the other person has, wanting to change or bring into their reality.
As a spirit you can notice, and you’ll only notice where you are, you can notice the differences or the baggage as something you’d like to go through with this person and also learn from. Or just help. Or you can be in another place where this is too much for me. I don’t want to be involved. There’s no right. There is no wrong. It’s just choices.
Anon: Is this just another short learning experience, or is there any further potential in this relationship?
Council: There is always potential. But what we like to put out there to everyone over and over again, you are the creator. If there’s potential and you want to stay in this relationship and see how you create it the way you want it to go, it’s because that is your focus and your heart’s desire. Your wanting will make it the way it will appear in your reality.
So yes, of course there’s the possibility of a relationship with this person. And there’s also the letting go if that’s what you wanted. Always know that you are the creator. What will you learn in the relationship? How will you bring love into this relationship?
Everyone has your so-called baggage. You have baggage. Where is it?
Always remember it’s your choice on the path you take. It’s not written in stone anywhere that you must do this because there’s this contract. There is no contract. There’s just spirits coming to help and say, “I’ll be there for you. I’ll go through this with you. Or I’ll pop in for a little while.”
The #1 example we’d give you is to look at this relationship. Is there enough for you to want to work through the baggage? Or is it too difficult for you? Make that decision and then go from there.
“Well it’s difficult, but I’d like to create it a little differently.”
“Well it’s too difficult. I need to get out of this situation and find somebody else where it’s easier.”
Well you can do this also.
“Oh, I’d like to have two or three partners at one time and just have fun.”
You can create that too. You are the creator.
Anon: At the least I do feel like this person could become a friend in my life and I’d like to help them on their journey, but I’m not completely sure.
Council: Well, you can jump in there for a little while. Show kindness. Be supportive. Show love. See what you receive back. And is this making you feel you’re closer to the true you? Are you closer to spirit?
Whatever decision you make, whatever direction you decide to go in, if you don’t like it, well the answer is simple. You change your mind and you start creating in another direction. It’s as simple as that.
Anon: What would be the most loving way for me to approach this connection?
Council: Be genuine. Love yourself. And in every situation try to remember this person is also a spirit that has agreed to be in your life, and wants you in their life for whatever reasons. Isn’t that wonderful? What a wonderful friendship. So take this relationship where you want.
Anon: Is there someone else coming into my life with whom I’d be able to build or co-create a long-term romantic relationship?
Council: It’s entirely up to you.
Anon: What’s blocking a long-term relationship from coming in?
Council: Just your focus. Find your desire. Focus on it and it will happen.
Listen to the entire 7-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for the anonymous reader and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it. You can ask The Council your own question by typing it into one of the comment boxes that appear at the bottom of most of our blog pages.
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