Ask The Council

What will you ask Spirit?

How Can I Best Care For My Aging Dad?

This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Eden.

Eden: Hi, Bob & Cynthia. Could you please ask The Council how to best care for and support my aging dad? He lives just over an hour from me and is now 83 years old with a lot of health challenges popping up. He has a healthy mind, though, so we don’t want to explore putting him in care because he has said he’d absolutely hate that.

Council: With a healthy mind it is always good to encourage them to do more and more. You may have to spend more and more time with him, but do not take that independence away. And give them compliments on what they remember to do. It is always important to uplift the soul.

Eden: I’m concerned about him because he lives alone, and I’m aware he’s beginning to need more help. However, he is quite resistant to help because he likes to be independent.

Council: And so maybe, to get his input, you can suggest, “How would you like to have someone come in once a week and clean, and that’s it?” Or, “How would you like someone to come once a week and bring you food?” You do not change the whole environment. You get him accustomed to some sort of help, even if it’s for an hour a day. “Someone is coming in to make you lunch. Someone is coming in to do your dishes.” And that’s it. You do not do it every day. You do not let someone come in and take over. That is when spirit becomes depressed and loses itself.

Eden: So it’s a challenge to get him to accept help with things around the house, even though it’s clear that he needs the help.

Council: That is why we suggest one thing. Let someone come and do just one thing.

Eden: How can my sister and I best support him while also maintaining our own lives and jobs, and living an hour away from him?

Council: Of course it’s a difficult time to go through something like this, but as adults, you and your sister would have to set aside time that you both agree on, and that you can make visits to your father. Also, when there are times that you can’t visit, you have that person come in just to do that one thing so that he always has the ability to speak to someone. It is important that you keep speaking, that you have ideas and you share them, or a joke and you share it, because communication is important.

Eden: Do you see that we’ll have to cut back on our workdays to help care for him?

Council: We do not see that right now. And so with your imagination, focus on the way you want it to be. If you want him all of a sudden to say, “Yes, I need to go and live somewhere else,” or “I need to have more help,” now is the time to be imagining the way you want it to be, not the way you don’t want it to be. So see it being a helpful situation, seeing everyone being happy about what’s happening, and that is how you create it. Do it now.

Eden: How can we convince him to accept help and be willing to spend a little bit of money to receive that help?

Council: That is why we continuously say, do one thing. It is scary for an elder person to think they are losing their independence. But if he sees one person come and it’s not that bad at all, and the person is nice, and there’s no big change, and his life is not being taken away from him, then he will agree to more help. But this takes time, and we say, start small.

Eden: There are government-supported options for help at home which are subsidized. However, he is very resistant to spending any money on himself.

Thank you in advance for the advice.

Council: Right now the best thing is to get him to accept small amounts of help.

We send you peace and love.

Listen to the entire 5-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Eden and the rest of us, and let us know what you feel about it.

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January 3, 2025 Posted by | Audio Content, Channeling, Imagination, Questions & Answers, Spirit | , , , , , , | 2 Comments