How Can I Have a Romantic Relationship?
This post answers a question for The Council from a reader named Nina, who read our post, Can I Have a Long-term Romantic Relationship?, and says she has the same question.
The Council begins by asking Nina why she holds herself back? They feel she’s not genuine with the men she wants a relationship with and there’s an almost unconscious fear of failure, which she then creates.
Nina must work on herself and not speak or think so much why she doesn’t have a relationship. Think instead about the good things she has to offer a relationship. Don’t compare herself to others. Know that one of her lessons in this lifetime is to feel confident about herself. She shouldn’t meekly think she’d be good in a relationship, but she should feel the power within her to be part of a couple.
The Council tells Nina that she closes off her energy when she’s on a date with someone for the first time. Despite wanting a relationship so badly, she withdraws her energy and her dates feel this either consciously or unconsciously. Her dates feel they can’t reach her and there’s a distance.
Nina says she feels isolated. She used to appreciate herself because she built her life from scratch and she’s proud of what she’s accomplished, but she doesn’t want to be alone and feels ashamed she’s never been in a short or long-term relationship.
The Council says that feeling of shame is one of the reasons she fails in these relationships and they recommend Nina do a heart meditation to help change the energy around her. Cover herself in a green energy, feel a little light in her chest that grows, say that she accepts and loves herself, and send this love out into the universe. The people that will connect with this vibration will come into her life.
The Council says Nina has to change her own energy before she can have a successful relationship. She is the one keeping herself alone. She created this aloneness so she would ask herself why she’s not in a relationship, find the answers, and change her circumstances for the better.
The Council says the answer Nina needs is to feel so good and so loving for herself, and as she recognizes this love, send it out to the universe. This love will become a magnet to bring the right people into her life, whether it be a friendship, a romantic relationship, or a work relationship.
The Council advises Nina not to worry when other people say they don’t understand why she isn’t in a relationship. These people aren’t here to understand Nina’s path. Nina needs to get on the path she created so she heals and grows, and by doing this she’ll create the life she desires.
In an extended closing The Council wishes blessings to all who write questions and are able to follow their guidance. They say this guidance will help many who have similar questions and they send blessings to all who find this guidance helpful.
The Council advises everyone on this path to share their knowledge and love, particularly of our planet, the animals, minerals, and plants. Send love to everything and your life has to change.
Listen to our entire 7-minute session with The Council to hear all their guidance for Nina and the rest of us, and let us know how you feel about this session.
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Welcome
Bob & Cynthia
Welcome to Ask The Council, a blog where you can ask a group of loving and wise spirit guides a question and get an answer, for free. You can also contact us for a paid private phone session with The Council, and you can read the questions other readers have asked and the answers they’ve received. Other posts contain quotations from The Council that we hope you find inspiring, uplifting, and educational.
Ask The Council a Question
If there’s a question you’ve been thinking about and you’re curious how The Council might answer it, we encourage you to either use the blog’s Comments feature to ask your question, or contact us for a private phone session. You can click here to go to the ‘Let us know what you think about this post, or ask The Council a question’ section of this Welcome post and type your question there or you can type your question in the same section at the bottom of any post that inspires you to ask a question or leave a comment.
Since the blog is currently a project we do in our spare time it can take a while for us to do a session with The Council on a question and then publish a post on the session. Depending on the question and the session it can sometimes take weeks after a question is asked to publish a post with The Council’s answer. Please be patient.
The Council
Cynthia is able to communicate with a group of five non-physical spirit guides in a manner similar to the way Esther Hicks communicates with and speaks for the spirit guides, Abraham, and Jane Roberts communicated and spoke for the spirit guide, Seth. I (Bob) basically interview The Council as they speak through Cynthia during what we refer to as a session. Sessions generally last 5-15 minutes and are usually audio recorded. During the session Cynthia is aware of what The Council is saying and she also receives visual impressions and other types of telepathic communication from them.
The Council’s Basic Guidance
Since we began these sessions with The Council around 2009 they consistently emphasize a few basic ideas that we attempt to summarize here:
1) You are an eternal spiritual being in a physical body.
You are the energy and vibration of continuously expanding love, intelligence, and joy.
Your physical experience in your physical body and your psychological experience of your personality is a small part of the totality of who you truly are.
Let yourself imagine from time to time what it might feel like to experience more of the wondrous totality of who you really are, and don’t be surprised if you are able to experience this more often.
2) You are the creator of all that you experience.
As you open to the possibility your true nature is greater than you ordinarily perceive, it becomes easier to consider the possibility that this expanded you is truly the creator of everything that you experience.
If you’re used to thinking of yourself in a more limited sense, the idea that you are the creator of your experience may be difficult to understand. Our post, What About This Idea That We Create Whatever We Desire, offers insights into this idea.
3) You are here to expand the love you are into physical reality.
You chose, as a spiritual being, to come into this physical reality to experience the joy of expanding the love you are as a spiritual being, into this physical reality. This is your purpose for being here.
Finding Your Way Around the Blog
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The left-hand column on the Home page contain a long chronological series of posts with the most recent on top. Each post begins with a title. Clicking on a post title will take you to a blog page dedicated to that particular post. Following each post is a Like button where you can indicate to us and other readers if you like the post.
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At the bottom of the left column on the Home page is a ‘Previous Entries’ link that will take you to a page with a list of earlier posts.
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The right-hand column of most blog pages contains this Welcome message. Below the Welcome message in the right-hand column are some useful features:
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Search: Type a keyword or phrase and click the Search button to get a list of posts in the left column that contain the keyword or phrase.
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Navigation Bar
The Navigation Bar at the top of each page contains a link to the blog Home page and links to the following additional pages:
Welcome: A link that displays this Welcome message in the left column (and the right column). At the bottom of the Welcome message is a Comment box where you can post a general comment about the blog or ask The Council a question.
Questions & Answers: Use this link to display a list of introductions to our longer posts, most of which are responses to reader questions. This is an easy way to check out these more in-depth posts. They are listed in chronological order with the most recent post on top. Clicking on the post title will take you to the page where you can read the complete post.
Contact Us: The Contact Us page contains a contact form similar to the Comment form mentioned above. The difference between the Contact Us form and the Comment forms is that the Contact Us form is a private message to us (Cynthia and Bob). It is not posted on the blog. Comments appear on the post page where the comment is posted. The Contact Us form can be used for communicating with us about private sessions or other private matters you think aren’t appropriate for posting in a public Comment.
Bob & Cynthia
Ask The Council 
Hello! Thank you so much for the response. Yes, it is true that I am very closed off, mostly due to trauma. I also am incredibly scared of physical interaction with people I don’t trust. I have been scared and distrustful since I can remember. I have been trying to open up with friends and family and a lot got better, but I do not have success in romantic relationships. Did something happen in a previous life that is influencing in what is going on today? Thank you again!!
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