How Do I Let Go Of An Ex-Friend With Love?
This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Lindsey.
Lindsey: I’d greatly appreciate The Council’s insight on a friendship that I’m having a hard time letting go of with love. We’ve known each other for about 15 years, and the last five years haven’t been great. During this time I’ve felt the friendship to be somewhat toxic and one-sided. There was a breaking point for me about three years ago, but I still showed up in group settings. I’ve since distanced myself more this past year, declining gatherings if she would be present. I dream of her often, which I find odd since we’re not in each other’s lives currently.
Council: It’s because subconsciously you do think of this person all the time without being aware of that. And so you would dream of this person, you’d have memories come up about this person, and you’d be, with your human brain, trying to figure out what’s going on, where in a situation such as this you’d have to come more from your heart and not your brain.
And so if it’s a toxic relationship, it’s fine to put an end to it if that’s what you want. But would you stay out of social situations because of this one person? And if you did, then once again your focus is on this person. There would be other people there for you to talk with and hang out with. And so think of it this way. If you need to let go of this relationship, that’s fine. But look at the surroundings, the people you want to be with, or don’t want to be with, and then make the decision for what you really want. And make yourself comfortable in that situation, and learn to focus on these other people. And you would see your feelings would be different hanging out with others in that group.
Lindsey: These past few years I’ve done a lot of self-work and I’m unwilling to allow people in my life that bring down my vibration, or don’t have good intentions.
Council: Ahh, right there, you don’t want people in your life that will bring down your vibration. Let’s see. We will put it this way. You are in control of your thoughts. And so other people that are around you, how you choose to see them will bring your relationship up or down.
Are you practicing accepting people the way they are? Maybe not understanding them. Maybe not even liking the way they react to things, or the way they treat you. But if you could find one good thing, even it’s, “Well, you know, I really don’t like being around this person, or this person annoys me, but they are going through their stuff, and I’ll send them some love.”
Or if I can’t do that, don’t focus on their negative qualities. And so when you don’t focus on these negative qualities, your vibration will not go down. You can simply think, “Oh, they’re on their path. I don’t get it. I don’t have to get it. I don’t have to understand it, but I can accept that.
Lindsey: Do you know if this is a relationship from a past life?
Council: We’d say, yes, there were several past lives. But what we’re trying to teach now and get people to understand, that past life doesn’t matter. It could have been wonderful. it could have been horrible. It could have been some of one and some of the other. You are here now to learn how to focus and create the relationships and life that you want.
And so even though many people like to know about the past – did I have a life with this one, did I have a life with that one – it really doesn’t matter. You are taking leaps up the ladder of enlightenment and growing, where you can let go of the thoughts of the past and see what’s going on now, how you handle it, how you can accept someone, and then just let it go and put your focus somewhere else. You will see a huge change in how you feel, and how your vibration is.
Lindsey: Do you have any advice on how I can be more at peace with the distance between us so I can honor the boundaries I feel are needed?
Council: Honor your boundaries, the ones that make you feel comfortable. Know that you had a relationship for a while. Try to remember the good parts of it and now say, for whatever reason I don’t understand yet, it’s time to let that relationship go. It’s so simple. It’s your choice.
Lindsey: Many thanks for all your guidance.
Council: So focus now on what you want – a new someone in your life, a more peaceful relationship with people around you, being able to feel more love from your heart. Even if you don’t like someone, you can just understand you are a spirit, they are a spirit, and you are all on your own paths.
And so as always, we wish you love and fun in your creations, and learning from them, and moving on, and helping the other spirits in your life on their path. And always remember, bring in the love, bring in the love. You can always find it in anyone if you truly look for it.
Listen to the entire 7-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Lindsey and the rest of us, and let us know what you feel about it.
You can also ask The Council your own free question by typing it into one of the Comment boxes that appear at the bottom of most of our blog pages and we’ll answer it when we have time.
Or you can pay $60 to speak with The Council on the telephone for a half-hour by clicking this link. Once we receive your payment we’ll contact you by email to arrange a mutually convenient day and time for your phone call and your questions.
If you like this post, please click the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.
A Past Is Life Affecting The Health Of Your Current Life
This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Shree.
Shree: I had a stillborn child last year. Her name is Moksha. Will I have another baby?
Council: Yes, we can see you are creating where you will have a child. And we’d like to ask you, when you think of the child you lost, is it hitting on any memories? Is it giving you any scenes that don’t seem to make any sense to you now? But we’d say to stay with the feeling and see what you bring forward from this. And this spirit just came along to give you this particular experience.
Shree: Is Moksha waiting for me to get pregnant? I feel that she’s moved on.
Council: No. We see that you will get pregnant, but this particular soul has now moved on.
Shree: Are there other souls waiting?
Council: Yes there are, but we’ll tell you about your health and what you’re going through now. You were in human form in 1918 during the Spanish influenza. You lived through this pandemic for a year. During this time you helped many people and nursed many people through this – pregnant women that died, children that died – and you wanted to be of help and support, and try to make them better.
That whole year you worked without much rest. You were fatigued beyond what the human body could endure at that time, and yet you wanted to help. Finally, after one year you came down with influenza and were very sick. You had fevers, and you were sweating, and you were freezing, and you had pains in your whole body, and then finally you exited that particular life.
And so in your current lifetime you have carried these subconscious memories with you. It’s just to show you that past lives are very real and you can, at this present time, go through it again to learn from it and to change what you do in your present life. Your time here now is to focus on this present life.
Shree: Also, did I take my life after a stillborn pregnancy in a previous life.
Council: No, we don’t see that, but you were very traumatized by seeing many young children and babies die from this influenza.
Shree: I’m feeling lost most of the time. I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do with my life. When I want to do something, I can’t seem to push myself into doing it.
Council: Yes. The fatigue is still there.
Bob: From the life with the Spanish flu?
Council: Yes.
Shree: Is this ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder), and how do I fix this?
Council: You fix it by acknowledging that what you’re going through now comes from another lifetime, and that in your current lifetime you’re supposed to do everything to take care of yourself, which you didn’t do in that other lifetime. You gave, and gave, and gave. And so in your current lifetime it’s your desire to give to yourself and take good care of yourself.
And when you get this fatigue, it’s just part of that life coming forward. So when you get fatigued, we advise you to rest and listen to your body, but know that there’s nothing medically wrong. It’s just a past life that you’re trying to heal by finally taking care of yourself.
And meditation – the chakra meditation or the advanced meditation where you start with your toes – feel your toes and tell them they’re healthy. And now move to your feet and concentrate on your feet and send them love, and tell your feet they’re healthy. And then your legs, and then your stomach, and you go all through your body every day, feeling good, acknowledging your body is different and is no longer living in that past life.
Bob: It sounds like you’re saying that her symptoms don’t fit the definition of ADHD.
Council: No, not at all. This is a very big memory that’s brought forth in her body.
Shree: I’m so fatigued and tired, and I’ve been getting night sweats for a couple years.
Council: Ah, there’s that past life again.
Shree: Doctors are telling me it’s my mental health and sleeping problems are causing all this.
Council: It’s your past life that’s causing all this.
Shree: Why do I feel there’s something more to this?
Council: Because you need to recognize that you are safe and healthy, and to acknowledge from this information that you were of great help to many, many people. You did wonderful work attending to other people and helping them pass over, and it was exhausting. And so you brought this into your current life so that you could turn it around, and now be supportive and helpful to yourself, and acknowledge what a wonderful job you did in that other lifetime.
Shree: Or is all this in my head?
Council: (Laughing) Well, it’s in your head. That’s where your memory is, but it’s very real. Your mind recognizes it, your body recognizes it, so now you need to connect the dots and say, “That was then, this is now. I’m not going through that, but I’m bringing it forth to help me take care of myself, and acknowledge that as a spirit, in other lives I was very helpful, and now I need to take care of me.”
Shree: How can I overcome this, as it’s affecting my day-to-day life?
Council: With the meditation and perhaps with reading about the Spanish flu, and it might bring forth more memories where you can visualize you, and what you did, and what was going on, and just know that this is a memory.
Shree: On the subject of heartfulness meditation, I know I’m supposed to meditate, but again I can’t seem to push myself to do it.
Council: Start with the chakras, or if that’s to difficult, begin with the toes and work your way through your body, telling it to relax and telling it you are healthy this lifetime.
Shree: Looking forward to your guidance. Lots of love, Shree.
Council: This guidance will work if you follow it. And so even if you are exhausted and you can only do Step 1 of the chakra breathing, that’s fine. Do Step 1. Maybe for several days you just do Step 1, but then go to Step 2. You will bring yourself through this
Bob: Are you suggesting that after Shree’s done Step 1 for a while and then she goes to Step 2, does she do Step 1 and Step 2?
Council: Yes. And the change will become very clear in her body.
And so we’ve enjoyed this again, and we send you all blessings, and love, and happiness. And enjoy what you’ve created. And if you don’t like what you’ve created, then change it. Change it with your thoughts and how you think. You are a great spirit that’s here to learn many, many different things. And you’ve all created this time to come in knowing it would be difficult, knowing there would be a lot of chaos, but you came in to hold the beautiful light, to love no matter what, and you will see your lives change.
Listen to the entire 11-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Shree and the rest of us, and let us know what you feel about it.
You can also ask The Council your own free question by typing it into one of the Comment boxes that appear at the bottom of most of our blog pages and we’ll answer it as soon as we have time.
You can also pay $60 to have a live, half-hour telephone conversation with The Council by clicking on this link. Once we receive your payment we’ll contact you by email to arrange a mutually convenient day and time for your phone call.
If you like this post, please click the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.
Comparing the Ideas of Abraham-Hicks and Brian Weiss
Feeling conflicted about the message of Brian Weiss’s masters compared to the message of Abraham-Hicks
This post answers some very interesting questions from a reader named, Caroline, who’s been a long-time listener and lover of Abraham-Hicks. Caroline says, There’s really never been a message from Abraham I haven’t greatly resonated with. Recently I’ve become fascinated with the topic of reincarnation and read the book, Many Lives, Many Masters, by Brian Weiss. I feel very conflicted and confused after reading this because the messages of these masters seem to conflict with Abraham’s message in many ways. From Abraham I learned reincarnation exists, but its purpose isn’t to fix your past life mistakes or karma. Abraham says karma doesn’t accumulate and isn’t passed on from lifetime to lifetime.
We come into this reality to experience different beliefs
The Council says, first let’s begin with the two souls who are giving these messages. There’s Brian Weiss, who came into this reality to share this message about karma. This message is perceived as totally different from Abraham’s message. This is because we all come to this reality to learn different things and experience different beliefs. Brian Weiss chose to learn what he did about past lives and to share it. He shares this information for people who need to believe what he’s teaching. Abraham has come through Esther Hicks to share what you’d call a different message for other people who need to learn the way Esther is teaching, and function within those beliefs.
There’s no right and no wrong
It’s not that one of these people is right and the other is wrong. With your beliefs (what you choose to believe) you create in your reality. The people who hear about karma and how you bring it from one life to another, they need this teaching and they’ll experience lessons and learning through this teaching. Abraham says there is no karma and we’re here to have a wonderful time and create. Other souls who are on another level need to learn from that message. There’s no right and no wrong.
Choose the belief that makes sense to you
Learn about these two beliefs and then choose what makes the most sense to you. That’s how this reality is made. It’s made that we come here and have choices for every little thing we do. We have the choice what to believe. We have the choice what path we’ll follow. Many people can be raised one way and they have certain beliefs. As they get older they no longer vibrate with their earlier beliefs and so they change their beliefs. That’s the law of this universe. If Caroline disagrees with Brian Weiss’s message, she can play in her mind with the idea that there are other people who need that belief and she can allow these people to have these beliefs.
Caroline’s Beliefs
Caroline says she learned that the sole purpose of coming to Earth as a human is to have fun creating and sorting through desires and contrast. The Council says this is a wonderful belief for many people.
Freedom of choice is there for you
Caroline says she learned nothing is ever imposed on us, nothing is happening to us, everything is attracted to us through our thoughts and vibration. The Council says everything that happens to us and everything we experience is from our thoughts, our beliefs, and what we planned to experience in this life. No one else comes in and creates for you or tells you, this must be done this way and this must be done that way. The freedom of choice is there for you.
Caroline says, I learned from Abraham we can be, do, or have anything we desire. The Council responds, Of course. And if we want to go without and experience poverty, you have the freedom to do that.
It’s wonderful to be in alignment with your higher self
Caroline says, I learned from Abraham the best and only way you can help someone is to be in alignment with your inner being. I learned you can let yourself off the hook regarding thinking that you need to be helping people because everyone has their own inner guidance system and the best and only way you can help is to be in alignment with your own source. The Council says it’s wonderful to be in alignment with your own source, with your higher self. It’s also wonderful to have positive intentions.
We’re here to help others
You’re not here for the sole purpose of helping yourself. We come here from spirit, which is full of love. We come here bringing that love here and wanting to spread that love in this reality. You can’t do that by only taking care of yourself. You take care of yourself, but you look for others to help, to show compassion, to help them if they’re stuck on some part of their path. We don’t say this is something you have to do, but we’re here to spread the love. We are here to help others, not by forgetting ourselves, but by being in alignment and loving ourselves and sharing that love, compassion, and helpfulness with others.
Being selfish is NOT necessary
Caroline says, I learned from Abraham that being selfish is necessary. The Council emphatically states that being selfish is not necessary. Being selfish isn’t something you think of when you’re in spirit. You didn’t think you’ll come to Earth and only create for yourself. You didn’t think you will come to Earth and be selfish and you will come first and then everyone else will come. This isn’t how we share love.
Quotes from Brian Weiss’s Masters
Caroline says, Here are some quotes from the masters in Brian Weiss’s book. In my opinion, every one of these quotes conflicts with one or all of the statements I made above.
It’s just another path
“People of the religious orders have come closer than any of us to learning the lessons of life because they’ve taken these vows of chastity and obedience. They’ve given up so much without asking for anything in return.” The Council says this is something that people who follow certain religions need to believe. They aren’t closer to being enlightened. They aren’t higher on the rung of learning and moving forward because they’ve given up so much. It’s just another path and that’s the path they’re taking.
It’s not your higher intention to help someone so you can have a reward
Caroline says, “The rest of us continue to ask for rewards, rewards and justifications for our behavior when there are no rewards, rewards that we want. The reward is in doing, but doing without expecting anything, doing unselfishly.” The Council says it’s wonderful to ask for rewards. We believe Abraham called it putting your desires in your vortex. You have every right to want to enhance your life and have rewards. But it’s not your higher self’s intention to help someone so you can have a reward. Your reward will come naturally. The universe will help your reward happen. You’ll help others and you’ll be rewarded. That’s how the universe works. As you’re helpful to others the universe will say, How wonderful. We’ll now help this soul. We’ll show this soul what it feels like to be helped so they’ll continue to help others. We’ll give this person rewards. Whatever they’re thinking they’d like, whatever they’re imagining they can have, the universe will supply that for you.
Caroline says I feel like Abraham would say what I just quoted from Brian Weiss’s masters is such old news. The Council laughs and says it’s just another page in the newspaper.
You don’t come here carrying karma from other lifetimes unless there’s something you desire to experience
Brian Weiss’s masters say you should check your vices before you come to this point. If you don’t, you carry them over with you to another life. Only we can rid ourselves of the bad habits we accumulate when we’re in a physical state. The masters can’t do that for us. If you choose to fight and not to rid yourself, then you’ll carry them over to another life. The Council says this is another belief that many people need. It helps them through fear to learn how to be another person so they don’t carry what they believe they’ve done in other lives. It’s just a belief. You don’t come here carrying karma from other lifetimes unless you want to experience something, as we’d say, the other side of the coin.
It’s your choice
But it’s your choice to experience something you handled one way in one life and you wish to handle another way in your current life. It’s not a punishment. It’s something you choose to bring in and see how the other side feels, or how to do it differently. It’s your choice to go through that. It’s your choice to say: I did it this way. Let me see what would happen if, say, I didn’t turn my back on this person. Let’s see what that would look like. In spirit, very calmly, you plan some of the things you wish to experience. It’s all your choice.
It’s wonderful to ask for more
Caroline says the masters say we must accept what comes to us at a given time and not ask for more. Abraham says asking for more and accumulating desires in your vortex and bringing desires into physical reality is the purpose of life as a human. The Council says when you come here it’s to have a lot of fun, even if it’s stressful or challenging. The fun part is working it out, turning the situation around, and finding another way to experience it. As you’re going through your daily life it’s wonderful to ask for more. It’s wonderful to have desires.
Purpose of a child’s death was not to satisfy anyone’s debt
Caroline says, When speaking about the premature death of Brian Weiss’s infant son the masters say: “Your son’s heart was also important for it was backward, like a chicken’s. He made a great sacrifice for you out of his love. His soul is very advanced. His death satisfied his parents’ debts”. The Council emphatically states that this death did not satisfy anyone’s debt. The parents, the child, everyone agreed to that. It was an experience that was wanted. The purpose of Brian Weiss’s son’s death was to see how, through love, they’d get through it. The child isn’t suffering. The child didn’t have this horrible thing happen to him. The parents aren’t being punished for some karma or something they did in another lifetime. It was an experience of the souls loving each other so much that they’d help each other go through this death.
Many people need to believe there’s karma and debts you have to pay
Bob comments he’s not sure the previous quote is accurate, but he asks The Council if they can explain why the masters may have said what they said. The Council says it’s because there are many people that need to believe there’s karma and debts you have to pay. And usually there’s the belief you have to pay these debts by something horrible happening to you. It’s necessary for those people who need to grow by learning this particular way.
Caroline says: Abraham says over and over that nothing is ever imposed on us, especially something from your previous lives. The Council agrees.
You’ll automatically have people come into your life that match your vibration…
Caroline quotes Brian Weiss’s masters again: “We also must learn not to just go to those people whose vibrations are the same as ours. The Council says we normally will just radiate to each other. You won’t have people in your life for a long time that don’t radiate where you are. If some people are growing more slowly, if they have more difficulties, their vibrations can’t reach yours and stay with you for a long time. You’ll automatically have people come into your life that match your vibration, that will help you with something, or that will push your buttons and make you crazy because you asked for this in spirit. The vibration of love is within all of us.
The vibration is just different
Caroline continues with the same quote: “It is normal to feel drawn to somebody who is on the same level that you are, but this is wrong. You must also go to those people whose vibrations are wrong with yours. This is the importance in helping these people.” The Council says it’s not that the vibration of these people is wrong because they don’t agree with you. Their vibration is just different and it’s in your life for you to decide how to deal with it.
Make choices that bring love into your life
Caroline asks, What’s the deal? Do we have to successfully do certain things in our lifetime? The Council says, No. It’s successful if you planned a certain life and you went through the list and did everything you wanted, which never happens because there’s always more and more you want. You’re just here to have fun and experience things. The #1 thing you’re here to do is to make choices that bring love into your life and this reality. When you can experience this love it grows and grows and everyone in your reality, whether you know them or not, feels this love and it will help them on their path.
There’s no unwanted karma that follows you from lifetime to lifetime
Caroline asks if karma is passed down through lifetimes? The Council says there isn’t any karma. If you believe there is, you’ll come up with a story and create something. If you don’t understand why something is happening, you think you must have done something in another life, and so you believe this is passed down. It’s not passed down. There is no karma that says you must pay for something or settle a debt. And yet there are many people who believe in karma because they need to believe it for how they planned to experience their current life. There is no karma that needs to be settled, cleaned out, or cleared before you can go on, or it will follow you from lifetime to lifetime.
It’s not karma if you choose, in spirit, to experience it
Caroline asks if bad things like the death of a child happen because of your karma. The Council says it doesn’t happen because of your karma. It happens because you’ve all chosen in spirit to experience this.
You can be, do, or have anything you desire
Caroline asks if asking for more in life is bad? The Council says never. We’re supposed to be here to ask for more and more and more, and to experience everything we can in this reality. We’re here to create as much as you want. We believe Abraham said you can be anything and have anything, and that’s why you’re here.
Lastly, Caroline asks if people who give up things like sex and choices get closer to source? The Council has a big laugh at this question and says, No, we don’t agree with that.
Caroline says I feel like all the answers to these questions is, no. The Council laughs again and tells Caroline she has all her answers.
We feel the information in this post will be helpful to many people. Listen to the entire 20-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Caroline and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it. Or you can ask your own question by typing it into a Comment box that appears at the bottom of most of our blog pages.
If you like this post please consider clicking the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.

