Ask The Council

What will you ask Spirit?

Questions About an Abusive Separated Husband

This post answers questions from a reader named, Jolanda, who says 18 months ago she ended an 8 year relationship with her verbally and emotionally abusive husband, but because they have a child together they communicate almost daily, which gives him opportunities to manipulate her emotions.

The Council doesn’t think it’s necessary to have contact with your husband almost daily. It’s something you need, but your husband doesn’t. Is this because you don’t want to let go of your husband? If this relationship is hurtful, why would you want to stay in it? You can co-parent a child without having daily communication with your spouse.

One of the lessons you’ve created for yourself in this lifetime is protecting yourself and learning how to make boundaries. The Council says they don’t see this boundary-making happening. There’s no need to punish yourself. If you can begin setting these boundaries you’ll feel a little more powerful and you’ll allow the relief and healing to come into your life.

The Council says they don’t see a reconciliation with the husband occurring at this time. Recognize him as a spirit on his own path and learning his own lessons. You feel the love for him because you recognize him as a spirit. Wherever he is on his path, you can love him and let him go, and make the boundary to protect yourself, and change your life to a more powerful and peaceful one.

Jolanda says she and her husband agreed a few weeks ago they weren’t getting back together and she feels betrayed that he’s apparently moved on with a new girlfriend. The Council asks Jolanda to find the energy to understand this agreement between the two of them. And if he changes his mind and says he wants to be with her again, can she make the boundary and say, “No. Enough. I can’t be in this type of relationship.” Instead of waiting to see where your husband is in this relationship, make your own boundaries. Think about how you’ll move forward and how you can get free from this relationship and find the happiness you wish for?

Jolanda says she’s pining for the love she had with her husband and wishing for someone else to love, but feels like she’ll never love anyone but her husband. The Council says the love she and her husband had isn’t there right now because there are lessons Jolanda needs to learn. Wishing for someone else to love is a wonderful direction to go in. Focus on this. What kind of person do you want in your life, down to every detail you can think of? And be ready to let this relationship in? When you can focus more on the new person you want in your life, things will change in this direction.

Jolanda says she feels her marriage was a divine bond and that she and her husband are deeply connected at a soul level. The Council says of course there’s a soul connection. This relationship was all agreed to in spirit so you could discover the role of independence, the role of boundaries in your life, the role of speaking up for yourself, and the role of learning how to protect yourself.

The Council closes by telling Jolanda: When you begin to love yourself enough to protect yourself; when your begin to believe there’s another way, and there’s more for you, and the soul who is your husband needs to go on with his lessons; when you begin to focus in a whole new direction on what you truly want in your life; The Council promises Jolanda her life will begin to change for the better.

Listen to the entire audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Jolanda and the rest of us, and let us know what you feel about it.

If you like this session, please consider clicking the Like button in the section below the recording to let us and our other readers know. Thanks.

October 7, 2018 Posted by | Audio Content, Channeling, Love, Marriage, Pre-Incarnation Planning, Questions & Answers, Relationships | , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Choosing Two Abusive Marriages to Learn What You Want

This post is inspired by follow-up questions from Vacha who has been in an abusive marriage and has moved back to India with her parents. This is Vacha’s second marriage and both husbands were physically abusive.

The Council asks Vacha if there’s any question in her mind that she did the right thing when she left her husband. They imagine if you’re in an abusive situation, you’d feel comfortable that you had the power and the knowledge how to get out of this relationship.

Vacha asks The Council if she has any karmic accounts with her two husbands, and The Council says this in not the case.

The Council asks Vacha if she sees a pattern in why she chose these two abusive marriages. These have been lessons about awareness. The signs of abuse were there before each marriage. What has Vacha learned from these relationships? The Council says if Vacha doesn’t start asking herself this question, she will bring another abusive relationship. She has created this situation so she would learn about awareness, self-worth, courage, and how to create what you want.

Vacha asks if The Council sees her in a good relationship in the future. And The Council says she must do the work they describe if she wants a good relationship. Let go of the fear of what she’s experienced and let go of the question if there’s someone better for her. Focus on herself and find within the strength to believe she deserves better. Visualize a better life. Think of the abusiveness as a learning lesson and then let it go.

Vacha asks if there’s a chance she planned to have these abusive relationships before coming into this world, and The Council says definitely.

The Council says Vacha needed to fail in these two marriages in order to see what she wanted to learn. And she’s right on track; there’s nothing wrong here.

Listen to our entire 7-minute session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Vacha and the rest of us, and let us know what you think.

February 25, 2017 Posted by | Audio Content, Channeling, Karma, Marriage, Pre-Incarnation Planning, Questions & Answers, Relationships | , , , , , | 1 Comment

   

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