Ask The Council

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Does a Past Life Explain Why I Can’t Make Friends?

This post answers questions for The Council from an anonymous reader who’s 22 years old and says, Since I was small I never seemed to have any solid friends or long-term friendships. They always seem to end in either dramatic ways or simply letting each other go one day and never speaking again.

The Council says they see a particular past life where a similar situation was experienced because Anonymous never behaved how you truly felt. You behaved as if you were being of service. There was no true friendship. You tried to make and keep friends by serving and doing everything for these people. You changed your personality and were the way you thought these people expected you to be.

In your current life it’s quite different. What you’re doing in this life isn’t serving as much as being of service to these other people. What you’re experiencing and what you planned to do was to be in communication and in a relationship with these different people, but to be in a way that would annoy them and have them find fault with you and pull away.

What you volunteered to do was to teach these people how to respond to others who aren’t exactly the way they want these people to be. In your current life you offered to help others, to be of service again, but just by being yourself and to have traits that these other people weren’t interested in.

What you set up was, at a very early age to somehow feel that you weren’t worthy to have friends. You set this up at an early age so that as you grew, you created relationships where you didn’t feel wanted and you experienced this by family and other people pulling away.

As you move forward, what needs to be done for you to change this pattern is to be who you truly are, but take the focus off yourself and show true interest in other people. Ask other people about themselves. Listen to what they have to say. When you show interest in others, that energy will come back to you and you’ll find others who now want to be with you and be interested in who you are.

This was a big challenge you set up. All these people that dropped out of your life,  how they handle it and how they learn from it is a lesson for them. It’s not your concern how they learn from this situation. You did your part by trying to teach these people to be different, to accept how they were, and to see you for who you really are. It was you helping many souls.

Anonymous says, I always wracked my brain why I can’t make friends because most of the time, especially since I was around 16 years old, I’ve tried my hardest to be a good friend and fit in. The Council says don’t try to fit in. Be yourself and focus attention on truly learning and being interested in other people.

Anonymous says, In high school I thought once I got to college where I could be with a new group of people and have space away from my parents, I’d surely be able to make tons of friends. But the same cycle continued and now I’m about to graduate. Currently I feel I have two true friends, my fiancé and my mother. I’ve also always butted heads with family members and in certain periods of my life I didn’t speak to one or both of my parents. I’m aware that when I was little my parents would sometimes say tell me I was unlikeable, but my current situation seems bigger than just a self-fulfilling prophecy. It feels like this is something I’m meant to overcome as part of my life purpose, but for a reason I don’t understand. Do I have a past life that could help explain why I feel, at the root of my soul, like an unlikeable outcast?

The Council asks you to connect the past life they mentioned earlier in the session to now. Decide you’ve done enough from that past life and you wish to have a new path in your current life where you truly appreciate yourself, don’t try to fit in, and be your true self. When you do, you’ll bring into your life the kind of people that are also able to appreciate you. Fitting in is what you did in this past life.

When you act one way because a person likes you that way, and another person likes you another way so you behave in that way, you are not being yourself. You’re being who you think these other people want you to be. Be yourself. Be kind. Be compassionate. Focus on positive thoughts. Be interested in what people are doing. Share your stories and you’ll see a difference.

Listen to the entire 8-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Anonymous and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it. Or you can ask The Council your own question by typing it into one of the Comment boxes that appear at the bottom of most of our blog pages.

If you like this post please consider clicking the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.

October 29, 2021 Posted by | Audio Content, Channeling, Feelings, Other Lifetimes, Questions & Answers, Relationships | , , , , , | 2 Comments

Are There Things We Ask For That We’ll Never Get?

This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Chris, who wants to find the meaning in giving up three years of her life to help her brother who was ill and eventually died. Then his son took his own life two days later in despair.

The Council says it was a wonderful thing that you were able to support your brother for three years. Instead of looking at your situation as giving up your life, you wanted to do this to learn to be there for others. You created exactly what you wanted.

Chris says she was beyond devastated while trying to pick up the pieces of her own life following this massive tragedy. The Council says it will help you to pick up the pieces if you look at how difficult the situation was for your brother, and your being there, whether you felt it at the time or not, was a great help to him. This help was something your brother wanted to feel. He didn’t want to feel alone. He wanted to feel support and you fulfilled that wish as well as your own wish to be there for someone else. This was three years of doing exactly what you pre-planned in spirit.

Chris says, My brother’s wife had sheltered her husband and their son from help and guidance from me and my sisters prior to their passing so there wasn’t any way for us to help them. After a year I was recovering and ready to get my life back. I was still hoping to develop a loving relationship of my own. Through my work in his office I attracted a wonderful man who was in a dead marriage. He was the most incredible man I ever met. It surprised me that I’d meet someone in my later years. We developed a close, non-physical deep friendship.

The Council says this was a time for you to realize what you loved about this relationship so that when you create something more permanent, you’d know exactly what you want. Your experience was to be in this relationship and feel the happiness as something different from the losses you experienced. What is it that you like? What is it that you feel was so important that helped you? Make a note that you’d like to experience these things when you create a new relationship.

Chris says, I thought finally this man was worth the wait, but this relationship seems like it’s going nowhere. I was hoping God was finally giving me a gift, but now it appears he’s not. The Council says you’re giving yourself the gift. You are the God in your life. If you want a permanent relationship, you should start now creating it with your mind. Feel what it would be like to be in a permanent relationship and have the kindness and interest you wish to experience. You are the creator.

Chris says she feels hopeless to ever have someone of her own, and The Council replies, This kind of thinking won’t get you what you want. Chris continues, After decades of looking and being open to love, I wonder if I’m meant to be alone? The Council asks Chris, Do you believe you can create the relationship you want? Do you believe you deserve it? Do you believe that you’re the one that will bring this relationship to you? If you can honestly answer yes to these questions, then this is what you’ll have. There’s no reason to wonder, Will I get this relationship? Will God bring it to me? Just by wanting this relationship, it’s there for you. Know that after everything you’ve come through, it’s your turn to experience happiness now, to experience the relationship you want, and move forward with your life.

Chris says, I’ve given everything in love and service and I feel completely empty. Thanks for your direction. Basically, are there things we ask for that we’ll never get?

The Council says if you don’t believe you can have what you want, and you don’t know that you are the creator of your life, of course there will be things you ask for that you don’t get. If you use visualization and the feeling of what it is you want, anything you ask for you’ll get. The only reason you wouldn’t get what you ask for is if you’re not working to create it.

Create in vibration first. See what you want in the dimension of vibration and then it must come to you.

Listen to the 6-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Chris and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it. Or you can ask The Council your own question by typing it into one of the Comment boxes that appear at the bottom of most of our blog pages

If you like this post, please consider clicking the LIKE button that appears in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.

June 28, 2021 Posted by | Audio Content, Channeling, Creation, Feelings, Helping Others, Love, Pre-Incarnation Planning, Questions & Answers, Relationships, You Create Your Reality | , , , , , | Leave a comment

What’s Going On with This Relationship with My Co-Worker?

This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Gabby, who asks about a situation she has with a co-worker that’s become serious. She says, I remember when I first met her I felt something about our connection that I interpreted as romantic interest. The Council says that’s because a romantic interest is something you want to create in your life. On meeting this person you hoped a romantic interest was present.

Gabby says the feeling between us is intense, but after interacting with her for the past year or so, not only doesn’t it seem like we’ll have a romantic relationship, but the relationship has become very toxic and full of drama.

The Council says the relationship will go in the direction of drama if your vibration is wanting something and the other person isn’t wanting what you want. It’s like a little battle that goes on that begins to cause separation because right now you’re hanging on to something the other person doesn’t want.

Gabby says, I gave her so much love, but it’s like she has a wall and can’t accept any of it. The Council says it’s not that she can’t accept your love. She isn’t interested in that kind of relationship with you. When you give and give and give, at first it’s nice, but then the other person will begin to see you have feelings that they don’t want from you. This is when you have the drama and the basis of the relationship changes.

Gabby says, When I stopped giving so much I noticed that there’s nothing there, which makes me very confused. How can you have all this connection with someone and at the same time there’s absolutely nothing? The Council says you can have a wonderful and strong connection with someone because of the past lives you’ve had together, but that doesn’t mean that in this particular life there would be a romantic connection.

Gabby says, I don’t think this has ever happened before in my life and I don’t know how to interpret it. What’s the purpose of us meeting in this lifetime if our intense connection simply disconnects? The Council says the purpose that you set up in spirit before you came into this lifetime was to be supportive of each other. In spirit you didn’t create this relationship to be a romantic one.

Looking at this relationship what have you learned? Have you learned not to push to have something happen that you see the other person doesn’t want? It’s a simple lesson of being aware of what’s going on around you and in your life and knowing it’s okay not to have this particular relationship grow the way you want it to. It’s safe to let go of this idea of romance with this person and look for it somewhere else.

Gabby asks, What do this other person and I need to learn? The Council says you need to learn to be friends if that’s what you both want to create. You need to learn how to create distance between each other and how to live your own life and your own path and still be friendly.

Because of past lifetimes when there was a stronger connection, it was a fun thought for both of you to see if you could just come into each other’s lives and be friendly and help each other out. This is what you intended to experience. You just wanted to get together and make a friendship happen and share other parts of your life.

Gabby says, I’m at the end of my rope here. The Council suggests you let go of the rope and look around. When you start putting out the vibration of wanting to find someone who can come into your life and you can have that romantic relationship, it will come. Let go of the idea of a romantic relationship with your co-worker and wish this person well. Wish yourself well and go into detail about the kind of relationship you’d like. What kind of person? How would you like the relationship to be? See this and focus on it every day and it will come.

Listen to the entire 5-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Gabby and the rest of us. Or you can ask The Council your own question by typing it in one of the Comment boxes that appear at the bottom of most blog pages. Priority will be given to comments that are brief and to the point.

If you like this post please consider clicking the LIKE button that appears in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.

May 25, 2021 Posted by | Audio Content, Channeling, Questions & Answers, Relationships, Spirit, You Create Your Reality | , , , , | Leave a comment

What’s the Relationship Potential for Two of My Men Friends?

This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Kali, who says: I’m open to a relationship since the sudden death of my partner and children’s father seven years ago. Two men are currently in my life as friends only. Both have major issues and I have a tendency to rescue others. Do I cut my losses and move on, or is the connection I feel with them both a reason to stay and see what develops?

The Councill asks if Kali wishes to go forward in this lifetime you’re creating and rescue these two? We won’t tell you whether to cut your losses or to stay in these relationships, but when you think of these things does it bring you joy? Do you want to move forward in something brand new, or do you want to stay in these relationships hoping to see where they’ll go?

This relationship of friendship is what you wanted to create when you were in spirit. Through these friendships you’ll have your eyes opened and you’ll see more about the three of you together. From what you experience in these two relationships you’ll make up your mind what you want and which way you want to go. Look at what you have. Is it more of the same? Is there much more that you want? Learn from this.

The Council says if Kali wants either one of these friendships to develop into a more meaningful relationship, if it’s wanted between her and the spirit of one of these men, it is possible. The higher self knows what’s wanted, but it’s not jumping out to give the answer because you want to learn how to recognize what it is that you want and how to create the desires in your life that you want to be fulfilled. This is a time to experience, to think, and then eventually make up your mind.

Listen to the entire 4-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Kali and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it, or ask The Council your own question.

If you like this post please consider clicking the LIKE button in the section below the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.

January 25, 2021 Posted by | Audio Content, Channeling, Creation, Decision Making, Desire, Pre-Incarnation Planning, Questions & Answers, Relationships, Spirit | , , , | 1 Comment

Is There a Lesson in a Friendship with an Old Flame?

This post answers questions for The Council from a reader who goes by the initials, PE, who says she confessed her love to a friend a few years ago, but the friend didn’t feel the same way and PE was heartbroken and embarrassed. PE and her friend became distant after this and she let go of her pain over the embarrassment.

Recently this old flame came back into PE’s life and he wants to reignite their friendship by PE spending time with him and his new girlfriend. But when PE spends time with this couple she ends up feeling sad and doesn’t know why. She let go of the feelings she had for this guy and she’s not interested in him romantically any more. PE asks The Council if there’s a purpose or a lesson for her from this situation?

The Council sees PE and the guy she liked planned in spirit before they were born, to be together in this lifetime, but it was also planned if they were unable to find a way to be together romantically, they would at least be friends and be in each other’s life.

If PE is sad when she’s with this guy and his new girlfriend, the best she can do at this point is wish them well, accept the situation, and then take these good wishes into herself so she’s able to find her own partner. As you can be happy for this couple, that happiness will come back to you. If you’re unable to be with this couple for a while, find a way to get comfortable with this, but know that on a soul level you and this guy planned to be in each other’s lives, even if not romantically.

It’s PE’s choice to take the relationship in whatever direction she wants. He found a way to bridge the distance that was created previously and ask for a friendship. He’s following that part of their soul agreement, even if he’s consciously not aware of it. Now it’s up to PE to see what direction she wants to take her life. The Council adds if PE isn’t able to be a friend with this man in this lifetime, they can promise her she’ll have other opportunities in other lifetimes until they work out the relationship.

The Council says when you’re able to change how you see your situation and realize there’s another option that you both chose in spirit, perhaps you’ll feel differently. PE can feel good about telling her friend she loved him because she was following the original agreement. But because you and your friend have free will, it doesn’t always mean what you planned in spirit will come together easily. So you planned another way, which was to remain in each other’s lives, but as friends. Can you get to the place where you’re able to be friends with this man? If not, why?

As difficult as it may be, wish this guy and his new girlfriend well. Send them love. If you don’t feel it, fake it until you can make it happen. When you can truly feel happiness for them, your life will change. The feelings you have will affect your life, not theirs. Work toward feelings of forgiveness for him, for yourself, and for plans that didn’t work out. And know that you made a back-up plan which you still have a chance to follow. And if you’re unable to follow your back-up plan, you’ll be able to do it again in another lifetime.

Listen to the entire 9-minute audio recording of our session with The Council to hear all their guidance for PE and the rest of us, and let us know what you feel about it.

If you like this post, please consider clicking the Like button in the section below the recording to let our other reads know. Thanks.

August 17, 2018 Posted by | Agreement, Audio Content, Channeling, Choice, Free Will, Pre-Incarnation Planning, Questions & Answers, Relationships, Spirit | , , , | 4 Comments

Relationship, Dark Magic, and Asexuality Guidance

This post is inspired by questions from a reader named Gabriela, who previously asked The Council a relationship question. Now she’s following up on her previous question as well as asking about dark magic and her choice to be asexual.


Gabriela says when she tried to change the focus of her friendship with a women named Laura to a more romantic one it went badly. The Council asks if Gabriela was appreciating this friendship? They say Gabriela must appreciate the friendship first and then experience where this goes.

Gabriela asks The Council to shed light on past lives she and Laura have lived together and why they can’t seem to get together in this lifetime. The Council says they shared many lives together, but in the one that’s affecting their current lifetime, they had a happy relationship. What they intended in their current life was to come together as friends, which is a different kind of relationship than in their past life.

Gabriela carries with her memories of this past lifetime and wants a more romantic relationship in their current lifetime. Her friend Laura is remembering on an unconscious level that the two of them agreed in spirit to have a warm and close friendship. They are both in the same relationship, but have different ideas how this relationship should be. The Council says if Gabriela can accept a friendship, they feel she’d get a lot from this and would be able to find different partner to have a romantic relationship with.

Gabriela is the creator of her reality, and if she still wants a romantic relationship with Laura and if she has a strong belief in this, and if she’s able to concentrate on this romantic relationship without doubt, The Council says it can be created. But they add, Gabriela should be open to experiencing a friendship with Laura without pushing it to something beyond this, and she can find great happiness in this.

The Council says the friendship that’s wanted by both of them is capable of changing into something more, but Gabriela must experience the friendship first. That was the agreement. Once that’s done for a period of time, the friendship is capable of changing into something more romantic.

Dark Magic Rituals

Next Gabriela raises the subject of dark magic rituals and asks what The Council has to say about them. She believes that because these rituals go against other people’s free will, she is skeptical of them, but she also knows people get results with these rituals and asks how this is possible.

The Council says it’s your intention and your focus on what you’re trying to create that’s behind these rituals. Your focus is the magic, whether it be black magic, white magic, good magic, or bad magic. If you wish to harm someone, and you focus on it, you can create this in your reality. If you wish good for someone and you focus on it, you can also create this in your reality. The ritual helps you focus. On the subject of creating dark magic The Council says there is free will and everyone is able to create whatever they wish to experience.


Gabriela asks The Council why people are born asexual like her, because she says it can be a life-long loneliness sentence. The Council says the souls that come into this human reality in any way that is thought of as different are here for one purpose: to have the people around them accept them and show love no matter what you are.  We are all here to bring the vibration of love from spirit into our physical reality.

Listen to our entire 10-minute session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Gabriela and the rest of us, and let us know what you think.

June 20, 2017 Posted by | Audio Content, Beliefs, Channeling, Gender, Love, Other Lifetimes, Questions & Answers, Relationships, You Create Your Reality | , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A Mother-Daughter Relationship – Past and Present Lives

This post is inspired by a question from a reader named Merry, who says she’s always had a tumultuous relationship with her mother and asks The Council to shed light on the relationships they’ve shared in other lifetimes. 

The Council begins by saying Merry and her mother had very good relationships in other lifetimes and they remind her when the lifetime we share with a person is challenging, it’s not always considered a bad lifetime.

The Council says Merry and her mother were mother and daughter in a lifetime around the 1400s and were very close. At that time there were witch hunts and because her mother was good at making medicines for people someone accused her of being a witch. When this happened her mother tried to hide her daughter, but she was found and was drowned as the child of a witch, and her mother was locked in a cell for the rest of her life.

Merry and her mother agreed in spirit to return in their present lifetime, but her mother brought the memories of this previous lifetime with her. Instead of working with Merry to have a wonderful life, she turned off her emotions because she was afraid Merry would be taken away again. The reason Merry feels coldness from her mother is that her mother was afraid of being connected to her.

When Bob asked if there was a way to break down these barriers Merry feels with her mother, The Council said it would be difficult, but she should try to show her mother love and help her with everyday challenges. Love conquers everything. Show her mother signs of love in the littlest thing she does and the barrier Merry feels will begin to change. The purpose of this lifetime is to figure out ways to get close.

Merry says her mother is kind of her best friend, but her role as Merry’s mother ended when her brother was born. The Council says if Merry feels her connection with her mother now is one of being friends, can she learn to appreciate this? Can Merry see how her mother needs her as a friend? As Merry begins to appreciate this friendship the relationship will be able to develop further.

The Council says because both Merry and her mother were trying to make this lifetime work, they brought in a lot of fears that they are trying to overcome. Merry can meditate on what she’s gone through. She is strong. By asking about these challenges Merry knows there is more to what she’s experiencing in this lifetime. This shows she’s on the right path because a part of her that’s questioning knows there’s more and wants the answer. This is Merry’s connection to her higher self and is her spirit trying to get her to understand what The Council is talking about. Now, going forward, how does she handle things?

The Counsel closes by saying that through understanding what her mother has gone through and through meditation Merry can show her mother more compassion and more love, and when she can do this her situation must change.

Listen to our entire 17-minute session on Merry’s question about her relationship with her mother to hear all The Council’s guidance for her and the rest of us, and let us know what you think.


April 23, 2017 Posted by | Audio Content, Challenges, Channeling, Love, Other Lifetimes, Pre-Incarnation Planning, Questions & Answers, Relationships, Spirit | , , , , , | 3 Comments

Purpose of Sharing This Lifetime

This post is inspired by questions and comments from a reader who identifies herself as D. She says many years ago she fell in love with someone who didn’t love her back and the relationship went from friends, to enemies, to friends, and on and on for years. The Council asks D. how she see’s this happening when she looks back on this, and to focus on the aspect of what was able to bring them back to friendship again.

D. says she felt a strange connection to this man from the first moment she saw him. She’s never been able to let go of that connection and often feels stuck and depressed about it. Recently he married someone else and D. describes feeling more loss and pain. She has moved and stopped talking to him, but the thought of this man is with her no matter where she goes or what she does. She asks why her soul can’t let go and find happiness elsewhere.

The Council says D’s soul is very willing to let go, but her human part holds onto what her future could have been with this man. This leads to feelings of depression and loss because D. feels she’s just this human body rather than a spirit in her body.

The Council explains that truly loving someone is allowing them to be however they want to be, and they ask D. if she can allow this man the happiness he’s found with his wife. And can she now find this same happiness with other people who’ve agreed to come into her life for this purpose.

D. wonders if she and this man have shared past lives together and that’s why she keeps feeling connected to him. The Council says they have shared many lifetimes, but ask D. if she wants to focus on what was, or where she is now, and create her future.

The Council says this man’s role was to teach D. to let go and find love wherever she can. And they ask if she’s ready to let go and find the love she’s looking for within herself. Can she feel the love with every person who comes into her life? As she feels love for herself she will attract love from other people.

D. says she’s always known that love is eternal, and The Council says it’s at these moments that she’s remembering who she truly is as a spiritual being. They say we are all love and we want to bring this feeling into this reality.

D. seems to associate her connection to this man with feeling loss and pain rather than appreciating the time they’ve spent together that’s been good for her. The Council says D. needs to change her thoughts about this man and realize he’s a spirit in a physical body. That is what will give her relief. And then ask herself what else she wanted to experience in this lifetime. And tell herself she’s ready to experience the next part of this journey, to experience love, joy, and happiness. Can she do that?

D. asks why she feels connected to a soul who doesn’t feel connected to her at all and she asks if this connection is one-sided. The Council says the connection isn’t one-sided, it’s just that she chooses to be more aware and learn from this connection.

D. finishes by asking what she can do to stop this feeling of connection and what is the purpose of sharing this lifetime with this man. The Council says there are many purposes and at any moment she and this man were able to choose the path they wish to take.

The Council recommends what she perceives as loss, she now perceive as the love she is that she’s looking for elsewhere. Appreciate the positive aspects of this relationship when she thought it was good. Ask herself what she’s learned that is good from this relationship and how she can move forward by bringing new relationships into her life.

This session appears to have some unusually good advice for D. and the rest of us. Listen to the entire 20-minute session with The Council to get all the detail.

May 23, 2015 Posted by | Agreement, Audio Content, Challenges, Love, Other Lifetimes, Questions & Answers, Relationships | , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Jan & Will’s Telepathic Communication

This post is inspired by a question from Jan about an important friendship with a former student named Will who became like a son to her when his mother passed away. Jan describes feeling a spiritual connection with Will and believes that as spirits before they were born into this lifetime they planned to be in each other’s human lives.

But as Will developed from a child with autism into a young adult he proceeded to withdraw from friends, family, and finally Jan, to the point where she hasn’t heard from him in over a year and hasn’t seen him in three years. After reading one of our blog posts describing The Council’s advice to a reader experiencing a similar separation from her biological twin brother of 70+ years, Jan asked The Council for their view of her friendship with Will.

Click here to read the rest of this post→

March 9, 2013 Posted by | Connecting With Spirit, Expansion, Helping Others, Law of Attraction, Love, Pre-Incarnation Planning, Questions & Answers, Reincarnation | , , , , , , , , , , , , | 5 Comments


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