Does a Past Life Explain Why I Can’t Make Friends?
This post answers questions for The Council from an anonymous reader who’s 22 years old and says, Since I was small I never seemed to have any solid friends or long-term friendships. They always seem to end in either dramatic ways or simply letting each other go one day and never speaking again.
The Council says they see a particular past life where a similar situation was experienced because Anonymous never behaved how you truly felt. You behaved as if you were being of service. There was no true friendship. You tried to make and keep friends by serving and doing everything for these people. You changed your personality and were the way you thought these people expected you to be.
In your current life it’s quite different. What you’re doing in this life isn’t serving as much as being of service to these other people. What you’re experiencing and what you planned to do was to be in communication and in a relationship with these different people, but to be in a way that would annoy them and have them find fault with you and pull away.
What you volunteered to do was to teach these people how to respond to others who aren’t exactly the way they want these people to be. In your current life you offered to help others, to be of service again, but just by being yourself and to have traits that these other people weren’t interested in.
What you set up was, at a very early age to somehow feel that you weren’t worthy to have friends. You set this up at an early age so that as you grew, you created relationships where you didn’t feel wanted and you experienced this by family and other people pulling away.
As you move forward, what needs to be done for you to change this pattern is to be who you truly are, but take the focus off yourself and show true interest in other people. Ask other people about themselves. Listen to what they have to say. When you show interest in others, that energy will come back to you and you’ll find others who now want to be with you and be interested in who you are.
This was a big challenge you set up. All these people that dropped out of your life, how they handle it and how they learn from it is a lesson for them. It’s not your concern how they learn from this situation. You did your part by trying to teach these people to be different, to accept how they were, and to see you for who you really are. It was you helping many souls.
Anonymous says, I always wracked my brain why I can’t make friends because most of the time, especially since I was around 16 years old, I’ve tried my hardest to be a good friend and fit in. The Council says don’t try to fit in. Be yourself and focus attention on truly learning and being interested in other people.
Anonymous says, In high school I thought once I got to college where I could be with a new group of people and have space away from my parents, I’d surely be able to make tons of friends. But the same cycle continued and now I’m about to graduate. Currently I feel I have two true friends, my fiancé and my mother. I’ve also always butted heads with family members and in certain periods of my life I didn’t speak to one or both of my parents. I’m aware that when I was little my parents would sometimes say tell me I was unlikeable, but my current situation seems bigger than just a self-fulfilling prophecy. It feels like this is something I’m meant to overcome as part of my life purpose, but for a reason I don’t understand. Do I have a past life that could help explain why I feel, at the root of my soul, like an unlikeable outcast?
The Council asks you to connect the past life they mentioned earlier in the session to now. Decide you’ve done enough from that past life and you wish to have a new path in your current life where you truly appreciate yourself, don’t try to fit in, and be your true self. When you do, you’ll bring into your life the kind of people that are also able to appreciate you. Fitting in is what you did in this past life.
When you act one way because a person likes you that way, and another person likes you another way so you behave in that way, you are not being yourself. You’re being who you think these other people want you to be. Be yourself. Be kind. Be compassionate. Focus on positive thoughts. Be interested in what people are doing. Share your stories and you’ll see a difference.
Listen to the entire 8-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Anonymous and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it. Or you can ask The Council your own question by typing it into one of the Comment boxes that appear at the bottom of most of our blog pages.
If you like this post please consider clicking the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.
Tell others about this post:
What Can I Do To Serve Love?
This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Venus Trine Jupiter, who says they met a glowing blue-skinned woman on the street the day they submitted their comment. They say, After doing some Googling I’m almost sure she was a Starseed. I felt divinely inspired and touched. Perhaps this was a sign for me. As a result I’d like to ask The Council what I can do now to serve the name of love.
The Council says it’s interesting what you’ve created to bring you to a place where you want to serve and show love. You’ve created this glowing skinned person to make you feel there’s a sign. Many people need a sign before they go off in a healing direction or show love, compassion, and kindness to others. What you brought into your life is a person that had a condition with their lungs that affects the color of their skin because there isn’t enough oxygen.
This was brought into your life and created by you so you’d feel there’s something special about your seeing this blue-skinned woman. It’s wonderful that you created this person because it got you to a place of wanting to be of service and wanting to show love.
Venus Trine Jupiter closes by saying, I work for Jesus Christ and love is my mission. I’d love to hear a message coming from this source. The Council says your belief that you work for Jesus Christ is a wonderful thing. We advise you to study his words and what he taught while he was here on Earth. He wanted you to learn to love one another as you love yourself, not instead of yourself.
Always show yourself love in the things you do. When you look in the mirror, love the image that you’ve created for this lifetime. Speak words of kindness. Be supportive of people when they need it. Send beautiful energy to people you don’t know that you pass on the street. That is being of service.
When someone around you is negative, try to find the words to change the subject, or come at it from a different perspective. This is what Jesus taught. Show love in everything you do – compassion, support, understanding, and being a good listener – and then you’ll be doing what Jesus taught.
Listen to the entire 4-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Venus Trine Jupiter and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it. Or you can ask The Council your own question by typing it into a Comment box that appears at the bottom of most of our blog pages.
If you like this post please consider clicking the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.
Tell others about this post:
What’s My Life Purpose Now That My Husband Has Passed?
This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Grieving Widow, after she read our post, Why Did My Partner Crossover Sooner Than Expected? She says I also have similar questions. My husband passed suddenly in a car accident and I’m unable to accept it. I’m constantly trying to connect with him and continue our relationship.
The Council asks Grieving Widow what she’d need to accept her husband’s death. You know he’s no longer in your physical reality, but he’s here in spirit. There are ways you can connect with him through meditation or asking for a connection in your dreams. You can ask for little signs he’s around that would give you the comfort he’s really gone nowhere. He’s still part of your life, being around you, seeing what you do. He left because it was his wish and his time to finish this lifetime. It was to give you a chance to explore more of who you are and what you want moving forward.
Grieving Widow says she doesn’t want to be here without her husband and asks The Council what is her purpose here without him? The Council says to find out who you are. What would make you happy? What ideas did you have while your husband was still here about things you wanted to do, but never had the chance? Now is the time to move forward and do these things.
Grieving Widow says we have three sons and my relationship with my oldest isn’t good. How can I help him with his life lessons and be the best mother to all my sons when I can’t even find joy in anything anymore?
The Council asks Grieving Widow if she’s saying she doesn’t find joy with her children? Do you focus at all on how to be with them, be part of their lives, and invite them into your life to give you some sort of comfort? Communication is needed here. There’s a coming together to bring you closer together.
What you need to remember is that your children will see how you’re carrying on now that your husband has passed on into spirit. How do you handle this? Do you show them that you’re aware your husband is now in the spirit world, and that you know at some point you’ll all go back into spirit, and that your husband is helping all of you from spirit? Do you talk to your children and uplift them in this moment?
The loss of a husband is traumatic, but your children have lost their father. Do you focus on that? This is a way for you to learn to be of service to others, and at this point it’s your children that need you. How will you be of service? The Council reiterates that much more communication is needed.
Grieving Widow says, I don’t believe I chose to be without my husband and I’m struggling to find a purpose to stay in this life. Do I have a purpose to remain here? The Council assures Grieving Widow that you did plan in spirit with your husband that he would pass. Your purpose, as we mentioned before, is to find out more about yourself and what you would like. What are your interests? Hold your children together. Bring your family closer. Be of service to others.
The Council understands in the human form this is a very difficult time for you. Give yourself more love by accepting you are sad at this moment, accepting this is a grieving time, accept all of that, but somewhere within that make time to help others through what they’re going through.
Grieving Widow says, I feel my sons will learn their life lessons better if I’m not here because I feel I hinder them. The Council reminds Grieving Widow that she is part of her children’s life lessons and they are very aware of how you speak and how you act. Remember that the way you do this, you are adding to their lessons and showing your children how to be and how not to be. They need you in their lives for many more reasons. Be aware of your behavior and your communication. This is part of what they agreed to learn and you have all agreed to this.
The Council understands Grieving Widow’s feeling that she’s hindering her children, but because you’ve all agreed to your husband’s passing, you don’t hinder them. And if you feel you hinder them now, how do you change that? If you can learn how to meditate and how to find things to be grateful for it will change your vibration and help you through this time.
Listen to the entire 6-minute audio recording of our session with The Council to hear all their guidance for Grieving Widow and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it, or ask The Council your own question in a Comment box located towards the bottom of most of our post pages.
If you like this post please consider clicking the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.
Tell others about this post:
Why is My Life So Full of Roadblocks?
This post is inspired by questions from a reader named Hadassah who feels like her life has gone backward since she married her husband. Hadassah says she and her husband were both successful before they married, but now they seem stuck and have become roadblocks for each other. Hadassah wonders why this is the case and asks The Council for guidance.
The Council starts by saying that Hadassah and her husband are experiencing a wonderful roadblock, but can see how she might be experiencing this negatively. They say she and her husband agreed in spirit to come into each other’s lives and help each other reach for their dreams. In discussions with her husband she should plan with him and help him come up with ideas to move in a direction he would like, and he should do the same for her.
The Council says as the two of them work to support each other’s desires, their energy becomes positive, there is more love in these situations, and they will see this roadblock disappear. Their desire was to come together and focus on each other rather than themselves, and to be of service to each other. They say Hadassah will experience much love when she focuses on the feeling of helping her husband move forward toward what he wants from life. And because her husband is focusing on her and helping her move forward, she will have success with new ideas she comes up with.
The Council encourages Hadassah to have fun with being supportive to her husband and vice versa. They say this situation is not about Hadassah falling apart because she’s with her husband and nothing is working out. That is what the both of them created in spirit to get to this point where they can find the love within themselves and help each other reach for their dreams. They say that’s how the two of them wanted to be of service in this lifetime.
The Council says it’s important to really listen to her husband and come up with genuine ideas that help him reach his goals, and he can do the same for her. Bring the fun and the love and the joy into this and it will move much quicker than they think.
The Council says Hadassah and her husband are at a turning point where they can learn to be there for each other and want each other’s desires to be fulfilled. And The Council promises they will see a gigantic change when they bring the love from spirit into their lives and experience the feeling of really wanting each other to succeed.
Listen to our entire 14-minute session with The Council to answer Hadassah’s questions. We feel there’s a lot of guidance in this session for anyone in a relationship.
Tell others about this post:
What Is My Main Purpose in This Lifetime?
This post is inspired by a reader named Darla who is asking The Council for some career advice. She’s been a stay at home mother for 14 years and loves her children very much, but now she’s ready to re-enter the workforce and she has huge insecurities about what type of job she’d be suited for. She feels lost and like she’s not traveling down the right road to genuine fulfillment, and she asks The Council her main purpose in this lifetime.
The Council begins with a statement that everyone’s main purpose in all lifetimes is to bring the feeling of love into whatever you create. And they suggest Darla begin slowly and perhaps jump around a bit until she finds what gives her the most joy.
The Council says Darla intended to be of service, make a difference, and teach the people she meets how to speak their truth using pictures and stories. If she still feels joy around being with children they suggest she start out by volunteering with them, or possibly young adults or older people.
The Council sees Darla wanted to work specifically with pictures and recommends finding opportunities to teach children to make pictures of what kindness looks like. They say there was also a desire to work with older people who have memory problems and they suggest working with colors to stimulate them.
The Council says Darla has the ability to feel what others are feeling and this is a great gift. They recommend feeling what is needed in each situation, learning more about it, and coming up with ideas to bring out the comfort and joy in each person she works with by talking about feelings that need to be spoken and released or drawing pictures of these emotions. They say this will take time. And they add that of all the things Darla wants to create in this lifetime, trust, love, and safety figure prominently.
The Council says if Darla goes in this direction she’ll open a door within her and find the gifts she needs to bring out the creative side in people. They say this is a big job and it will lead her on a wonderful path, and there will be lots of growth and change within her as she finds ways to do this.
The Council says Darla wants to find a way to teach kindness to the people she meets. And they say as she goes from place to place she’ll see what’s needed and create her own way to bring this kindness out in others.
The Council says if Darla begins in the workforce, even if she finds herself working in a restaurant or a retail store or an office if that’s what’s needed at this point in her life, they say to go with this. But everywhere she goes, without judgement she will see how people treat each other and ask herself how she can show kindness and teach it creatively. The Council says this will take time, but there will be many rewards as Darla moves forward this.
Listen to our entire 11-minute session with The Council on Darla’s questions to receive the full benefit of their guidance for her and the rest of us.
Tell others about this post:
When You Serve
“It is automatic when you serve,
when you extend yourself to help others,
it is an automatic reward to the one extending this help,
but not where you would question,
‘What is in this for me?’
“It is a true feeling of love from the heart,
to be of service with no prize, with no return.
And yet there always is the prize,
[there is] the return.”
“It is the helping with no thought of your reward.
It is just the helping.”
“Your vibration grows,
your heart expands.”
“There is more and more understanding
[that] comes into the consciousness.”
“It is law.”
–The Council (Excerpt from 2-14-2010 session)
Tell others about this post:
Welcome
Bob & Cynthia
Welcome to Ask The Council, a blog where you can ask a group of loving and wise spirit guides a question and get an answer, for free. You can also contact us for a paid private phone session with The Council, and you can read the questions other readers have asked and the answers they’ve received. Other posts contain quotations from The Council that we hope you find inspiring, uplifting, and educational.
Ask The Council a Question
If there’s a question you’ve been thinking about and you’re curious how The Council might answer it, we encourage you to either use the blog’s Comments feature to ask your question, or contact us for a private phone session. You can click here to go to the ‘Let us know what you think about this post, or ask The Council a question’ section of this Welcome post and type your question there or you can type your question in the same section at the bottom of any post that inspires you to ask a question or leave a comment.
Since the blog is currently a project we do in our spare time it can take a while for us to do a session with The Council on a question and then publish a post on the session. Depending on the question and the session it can sometimes take weeks after a question is asked to publish a post with The Council’s answer. Please be patient.
The Council
Cynthia is able to communicate with a group of five non-physical spirit guides in a manner similar to the way Esther Hicks communicates with and speaks for the spirit guides, Abraham, and Jane Roberts communicated and spoke for the spirit guide, Seth. I (Bob) basically interview The Council as they speak through Cynthia during what we refer to as a session. Sessions generally last 5-15 minutes and are usually audio recorded. During the session Cynthia is aware of what The Council is saying and she also receives visual impressions and other types of telepathic communication from them.
The Council’s Basic Guidance
Since we began these sessions with The Council around 2009 they consistently emphasize a few basic ideas that we attempt to summarize here:
1) You are an eternal spiritual being in a physical body.
You are the energy and vibration of continuously expanding love, intelligence, and joy.
Your physical experience in your physical body and your psychological experience of your personality is a small part of the totality of who you truly are.
Let yourself imagine from time to time what it might feel like to experience more of the wondrous totality of who you really are, and don’t be surprised if you are able to experience this more often.
2) You are the creator of all that you experience.
As you open to the possibility your true nature is greater than you ordinarily perceive, it becomes easier to consider the possibility that this expanded you is truly the creator of everything that you experience.
If you’re used to thinking of yourself in a more limited sense, the idea that you are the creator of your experience may be difficult to understand. Our post, What About This Idea That We Create Whatever We Desire, offers insights into this idea.
3) You are here to expand the love you are into physical reality.
You chose, as a spiritual being, to come into this physical reality to experience the joy of expanding the love you are as a spiritual being, into this physical reality. This is your purpose for being here.
Finding Your Way Around the Blog
Home Page
The left-hand column on the Home page contain a long chronological series of posts with the most recent on top. Each post begins with a title. Clicking on a post title will take you to a blog page dedicated to that particular post. Following each post is a Like button where you can indicate to us and other readers if you like the post.
The footer section of each post identifies the date the post was published, the Categories the post has been assigned to, the keyword/keyphrase Tags assigned to the post, and a Comment link. If readers comments on a post, the Comments link will indicate the number of comments. If a post has no comments yet, the Comment link text appears as “Leave a Comment”.
Clicking on the Comments link takes you to a Comment text box on a post page dedicated to that post. Here you can type a comment in the text box and click the Post Comment button to have your comment displayed just below the text box. If you are replying to someone else’s comment, your comment will appear indented underneath the comment you are replying to.
At the bottom of the left column on the Home page is a ‘Previous Entries’ link that will take you to a page with a list of earlier posts.
Blog Features
The right-hand column of most blog pages contains this Welcome message. Below the Welcome message in the right-hand column are some useful features:
Email Subscription: Use this to subscribe to blog posts. You will receive an email notification with a link back to the blog each time a new post is published.
Search: Type a keyword or phrase and click the Search button to get a list of posts in the left column that contain the keyword or phrase.
Archives: The Archives list indicates the number of posts for each month listed. Clicking on the link for a month will display in the left column of the page a list of the posts published that month.
Categories: This is a list of keywords used to categorize posts. Posts can be included in more than one category, if applicable. Clicking on a category link will display in the left column a list of posts assigned to the category you selected.
Navigation Bar
The Navigation Bar at the top of each page contains a link to the blog Home page and links to the following additional pages:
Welcome: A link that displays this Welcome message in the left column (and the right column). At the bottom of the Welcome message is a Comment box where you can post a general comment about the blog or ask The Council a question.
Questions & Answers: Use this link to display a list of introductions to our longer posts, most of which are responses to reader questions. This is an easy way to check out these more in-depth posts. They are listed in chronological order with the most recent post on top. Clicking on the post title will take you to the page where you can read the complete post.
Contact Us: The Contact Us page contains a contact form similar to the Comment form mentioned above. The difference between the Contact Us form and the Comment forms is that the Contact Us form is a private message to us (Cynthia and Bob). It is not posted on the blog. Comments appear on the post page where the comment is posted. The Contact Us form can be used for communicating with us about private sessions or other private matters you think aren’t appropriate for posting in a public Comment.
Bob & Cynthia
Ask The Council 