Why Did I Choose This Life And My Husband?
This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Elizabeth.
Elizabeth: I have severe childhood trauma. I’ve never felt so lost in life. I’m 37 years old. Growing up I had a very turbulent environment with no therapy. I’m not sure if I can trust my thoughts. I feel crazy and lonely. When I was 26, my son was diagnosed with cancer. When I was 32 I lost my sister to heroin. My parents are still drunks and I feel like I’m their parent.
What’s worse, I’m not sure if I’ve settled in my marriage. I’m unfulfilled internally and I’m not sure what I should do. Fear is definitely there. Can you tell me why I chose this life, and why I chose my husband?
Council: You chose this life with all these experiences you mention to find yourself and to learn about yourself. How do you handle deaths in your family? How do you handle being in a relationship that you think you’ve settled for? How have you gotten through and handled your childhood traumas? It’s all about looking at yourself.
And so here, until now, you’ve had a difficult reality. So we say, Where’s your hope? Where’s your focus now?
You can feel lonely. And of course if you meditate you’ll eventually learn that you’re not alone. There are guides, there are angels, and there are ancestors that are around you to help you. But you need to sit down in quiet time and ask for this help. Go through every issue one at a time. Tell yourself: I need to understand this. How do I change my feelings about this? And know, absolutely without any doubt, that you will get the answers to your questions. You are not alone.
It’s the reality you created to go through these experiences, feel the loneliness, and then say, I must change this. I feel horrible. I don’t understand this. And you know what? I don’t want to go through this anymore. So let’s see what I can do.
And so you find joy. If you have to watch a movie, if you need to read a book, if you need to put on music, or do anything that will immediately uplift you. And when you’re in this beautiful, uplifting vibration, start thinking about what you want. What is something new you can bring in? And then follow that desire. Follow that idea in your head. Don’t give up on it.
Your purpose for coming into this life was to experience things from past lifetimes that you needed to repeat here – the losses and the sadness – but this time around you wanted to not just experience it, but to change it.
Bob: Can you give Elizabeth any clues about why she chose her husband?
Council: Because she’s been with this person in other lifetimes – and we see here there were a few good relationships – when this other soul was planning this path they agreed to come again and be supportive, or not be supportive and make things more difficult so that she’d learn on her own that she could change it. And so it was from being in spirit and deciding to come in and be whatever was needed for you to realize you can change things.
So you haven’t settled. You have agreed in spirit to this marriage. This person is here. Do you wish for your marriage to work out? Then you focus on that. Do you wish to move on and create something else? Then you focus on that. But you’re not settling. You’re going through all the things you wanted to go through to learn that you are the creator.
And many, many people at this time are going through their lives and realizing, I’m in charge here. My God, I can make this happier. What have I been doing being miserable? I can really change this job, this relationship, this sickness, this loneliness, this sadness. I can change all of it.
And so there’s a great shift taking place in your reality at this time. Everyone is heading toward feeling better about themselves and they are starting to create exactly what it is that they want.
Listen to the entire 7-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Elizabeth and the rest of us, and let us know what you feel about it. You can also ask The Council your own question by typing it into one of the Comment boxes that appear at the bottom of most of our blog pages.
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