Why Aren’t My Partner and I Planning to Have Children?
This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Denisa, who asks for guidance with her relationship with her life partner. We’d love to start a family together, but still nothing happens. My life partner keeps talking about wanting to have children with me, but he also mentions that he’d like my financial situation to be similar to his. I’d also like that, but I don’t know what to do to improve my finances. It seems very difficult for me right now. Is my financial situation the reason we don’t try to have children, or is it something else?
The Council says your finances are part of the reason you’re not trying to have children, and it comes from a lifetime you had as brother and sister in a very poor family. There wasn’t enough to eat, there wasn’t enough clothing, and you had no education. You were the older one and took care of your brother. You found the means to feed both of you and move forward in life. You were the one who took care of your brother.
In this life your boyfriend has the subconscious memory of the previous life. He desires you to be in a better financial situation, thinking this will take care of you both going forward in this life. Your boyfriend doesn’t want to have children where there will be an experience of lack. It’s the memory of you taking care of him, and that’s what’s causing this delay with children and with wanting you to have a better financial situation before you go forward.
It’s not that you have to do better financially. It’s that your boyfriend needs to deal with his issue of being able to independently take care of you and a family. That’s what he wanted to learn going forward. In that past life you took care of him. In this life he wanted to take care of you. And yet these memories are within him and so he can insist you do better financially.
This is where the hold-up with having children is coming from. If you both can agree on it we suggest you have children now. Your boyfriend will learn he can fulfill the role of being the breadwinner, being independent, learning how to be a family man, and learning how to take care of himself, you, and your children.
Denisa asks, Have my boyfriend and I agreed in spirit to have children in this lifetime? The Council says yes. You both want this a great deal, but there are the memories and past lives you need to work through. You need to understand where this desire for your financial stability comes from and you both need to let go of this.
Denisa asks, What can I do to improve my financial situation. The Council says that isn’t necessary. That isn’t what you need to do. What is meant now is to have conversations and be in a place where you can express that the financial situation you have, what you make now, is more than enough for now to start a family. Eventually we see you can make more money, but what’s needed is to express that your situation is okay and you believe he has the ability to take care of you, himself, and a family. Give him the confidence to go forward with this. This is what was agreed upon.
Eva says, It seems to me I don’t know which way to go. I’m thinking about writing a book about my childhood, what I’ve been through, and what I’ve learned from it. The Council says writing is very powerful, and writing is energy. We’d say write about your childhood or anything else because you’re putting more energy out and that will bring you more financial success.
Eva asks, What is the main purpose of our relationship? The Council says to be supportive of each other. Support your partner with words that give him confidence. Your partner wanted to teach you to be the supporter, the one who listens to the questions, the one who’s able to talk about what’s worrying both of you. You would bring guidance to your relationship. You’d make things are clearer for him to give him the opportunity to grow. As you listen to him and give him confidence, you are growing also because you’re fulfilling what you both agreed to.
Listen to the entire 5-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Eva and the rest of us and let us know what you think about it. Or you can ask The Council your own question by typing it into the Comment box that appears at the bottom of most of our blog pages.
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Welcome
Bob & Cynthia
Welcome to Ask The Council, a blog where you can ask a group of loving and wise spirit guides a question and get an answer, for free. You can also contact us for a paid private phone session with The Council, and you can read the questions other readers have asked and the answers they’ve received. Other posts contain quotations from The Council that we hope you find inspiring, uplifting, and educational.
Ask The Council a Question
If there’s a question you’ve been thinking about and you’re curious how The Council might answer it, we encourage you to either use the blog’s Comments feature to ask your question, or contact us for a private phone session. You can click here to go to the ‘Let us know what you think about this post, or ask The Council a question’ section of this Welcome post and type your question there or you can type your question in the same section at the bottom of any post that inspires you to ask a question or leave a comment.
Since the blog is currently a project we do in our spare time it can take a while for us to do a session with The Council on a question and then publish a post on the session. Depending on the question and the session it can sometimes take weeks after a question is asked to publish a post with The Council’s answer. Please be patient.
The Council
Cynthia is able to communicate with a group of five non-physical spirit guides in a manner similar to the way Esther Hicks communicates with and speaks for the spirit guides, Abraham, and Jane Roberts communicated and spoke for the spirit guide, Seth. I (Bob) basically interview The Council as they speak through Cynthia during what we refer to as a session. Sessions generally last 5-15 minutes and are usually audio recorded. During the session Cynthia is aware of what The Council is saying and she also receives visual impressions and other types of telepathic communication from them.
The Council’s Basic Guidance
Since we began these sessions with The Council around 2009 they consistently emphasize a few basic ideas that we attempt to summarize here:
1) You are an eternal spiritual being in a physical body.
You are the energy and vibration of continuously expanding love, intelligence, and joy.
Your physical experience in your physical body and your psychological experience of your personality is a small part of the totality of who you truly are.
Let yourself imagine from time to time what it might feel like to experience more of the wondrous totality of who you really are, and don’t be surprised if you are able to experience this more often.
2) You are the creator of all that you experience.
As you open to the possibility your true nature is greater than you ordinarily perceive, it becomes easier to consider the possibility that this expanded you is truly the creator of everything that you experience.
If you’re used to thinking of yourself in a more limited sense, the idea that you are the creator of your experience may be difficult to understand. Our post, What About This Idea That We Create Whatever We Desire, offers insights into this idea.
3) You are here to expand the love you are into physical reality.
You chose, as a spiritual being, to come into this physical reality to experience the joy of expanding the love you are as a spiritual being, into this physical reality. This is your purpose for being here.
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Bob & Cynthia
Ask The Council 
It was our pleasure, Denisa. Thanks for your appreciation.
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Hi, Confused and Sad. We’ll be happy to ask The Council about your marriage when we have time and we’ll post an audio recording of their response as soon as it’s ready. Thanks for your question. Love and light, Bob & Cynthia
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Hi Bob and Cynthia,
Thanks a lot for your help. It helped me a lot! Thank you, thank you, thank you! Love & light, Denisa
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I have been married for close to thirty years. The last few years have had me reflect on how different me and my husband are and how much we’ve grown apart . It seems our history and finances are the main reason we are still together . My husband is a good man but we have very little if anything at all in common. We rarely agree on anything and this makes me very sad. I feel in my heart we would both be happier apart and perhaps have a chance to find a true partner who can really make each of us happy. We both have tried to make each other happy for the sake of the kids and family but we are just two very different people. We are both scared to leave because we are all each other has known for so many years . I know we are both confused and scared because separation or divorce can be just as difficult as staying together. I have tried to figure out why we would have chosen each other and what lessons we were suppose to learn. And if it Is finally time to move on and co-create the life we would both like to live and find perhaps true love with a partner more suited for each of us that can make us each happy. We do try to communicate and work things out but our thought processes are just so completely different that it never ends well. We just seem to see things completely different. Have we learned all we could for each other and is it time to finally move on.
Confused and Sad .
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