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Will My Brother And I Heal Our Relationship?

This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Diana.

Diana: Thank you for your amazing work. My question is: Will my brother and I ever have healing in this lifetime? He denies the emotional abuse I experienced from our narcissistic parents, and he’s been pushing me away my whole life.

Council: Did it ever cross your thoughts that he denies this because it’s very painful for him to realize what you’ve gone through? And perhaps he’s gone through some things that he’s not ready to deal with? It’s not about wanting to push you away or not believing you, but about the uncomfortable feelings that it stirs within him.

Diana: On some level he does care though and wants to have some contact, but only if I never mention my experience or pain.

Council: We’d like to ask you at this point, are you constantly bringing this abuse up with him? It’s like he has a wound in his heart and you keep sticking your finger in it. He’s heard what you have to say and it makes him very uncomfortable. Yes, he’d like to have a relationship with you, but are you basing it on that you must talk about your abuse many times? Why aren’t you letting go of it?

If it’s you that wants this relationship, then it’s good for you to get to a place where you can realize it’s best, for now, not to speak of abuse, and to build your relationship without that part coming forth. And we say that this is for right now. If you can begin a relationship slowly and have it grow, then your brother doesn’t have to be afraid all the time that you’re going to bring up the abuse. When he’s ready he will bring it up, but he has to get to a place where he is ready. Can you allow your brother to grow at his own pace? Can you show compassion? Can you show love and have a relationship with him?

Diana: This doesn’t feel authentic to me so I’ve slightly distanced myself and I’m grieving a lot because I love him so much.

Council: Why do you think it’s not authentic to stay away from a painful subject right now? Why must it be authentic only if you can talk about this abuse? There’s pain involved in this, pain that you went through, and pain that he goes through.

And again we say it’s very important for you to look at yourself. Why must you bring up this abuse? You are keeping yourself in a painful situation. You are creating the distance because you need to talk about it and your brother doesn’t. You are ready, but he is not. So can you come together and start to build a relationship without talking about the abuse? You are keeping yourself in that relationship, in that situation that you went through, that was painful.

And this is all for your own growth to realize, what is your part in this? Why is it so important to speak about the abuse to someone who’s not ready? Perhaps you can find someone that will help you and talk with you about this, but if you truly want this relationship with your brother, you can leave out the abuse. And you can both come together and heal, and feel loving feelings for each other in time. The choice is always yours.

Diana: Will he ever understand, accept, and acknowledge my truth?

Council: Yes, eventually this can happen, but for now, can you let go of the subject of abuse?

Diana: Or will I also have to detach from him like I’ve detached from my parents? This leaves me completely alone.

Council: Detaching at this point will keep you alone and keep you feeling hurt. So why must you detach? It’s just a simple choice of, right now we will not talk about this abuse. Right now we’ll build a loving, caring relationship with each other by talking about other things and experiencing other things, and finding happy things to share. If this is what you want, then go in the direction of love. Go in the direction of joy. Go in the direction of compassion for yourself and your brother. When you choose this you’ll have the relationship you want.

We send you all blessings, and thoughts of happiness, and thoughts of love, and joy, and seeing the energy around you growing and becoming more beautiful, and you feel lighter than you’ve ever felt before because you are light. Let it shine.

Listen to the entire 7-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Diana and the rest of us, and let us know what you feel about it. You can also ask The Council your own question by typing it into one of the Comment boxes that appear at the bottom of most of our blog pages.

If you like this post, please click the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.

March 6, 2023 Posted by | Audio Content, Channeling, Healing, Love, Questions & Answers, Relationships | , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

What’s Going On with My Troublesome Brother?

This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Peace5, who wants to know about their brother. Peace5 says, He’s almost 23 years old and has been very troublesome lately. I don’t know what’s gotten into him. Even though he has an incurable disease, he stopped taking his medicine, he stopped taking care of himself, and he’s very nasty with me and our whole family, even my 6-year-old son.

The Council suggests trying to find compassion for your brother. Imagine how you’d feel knowing you have an incurable disease. Some people can find a way to work with an incurable disease and have positive thoughts. Others, like your brother, become depressed. Being nasty and stopping his medication is a sign he can’t find hope. He can’t love himself. He’s going through this depression because he’s closed himself off to loving himself and accepting love from others.

We hope your family will be able to find some sort of therapy for your brother that will help with his depression. Once he’s able to have a few positive thoughts, once he’s able to change his lower vibration, hope will come to him and he can have thoughts of helping himself. He can’t cure himself when he’s in the vibration he’s in now. That vibration must be changed.

If it’s at all possible we recommend doing the chakra breathing meditation we recommend in another post. You can do this with him and so can the rest of your family. This meditation will help align his chakras so he can feel better.

Get your brother the first Emmanuel book, by Pat Rodegast and leave it in his room where he can find it, but don’t tell him to read it. Once he’s able to connect with this book and begins to read about depression, illness, dying, and changing his life, it’ll start to put him on the right path.

Peace5 says, My brother takes medical marijuana for his disease, but I believe it’s harming him more than helping him. He’s not interested in anything at all, including looking for a job. All he does is lay around all day long, sleep, and shower four times a day even though he doesn’t go anywhere. He fights with us, curses at us for no apparent reason, and doesn’t speak with us. What’s going on with him and do you think he’ll ever change for the better?

Again The Council asks if you can find it in your heart to feel some compassion for your brother? Try to understand he’s in a difficult place. Can you accept where he is now? Offer him love. Speak with him. Talk with him like he’s a regular person. Don’t tiptoe around him or not say things in front of him. Get excited and share your life with him. Tell him stories. This will be the beginning of your brother feeling cared for.

Don’t force your attention on him, but when you’re around him try to be joyful. If you can be in a joyful vibration it increases the likelihood of your brother becoming joyful. It’s important you’re whole family is very accepting of you’re brother’s situation and condition and forget he has this incurable disease. Forget he’s laying around. Forget he’s doing nothing. Just be nice to your brother and accept who he is.

The Council asks Peace5 to remember you can’t make your brother better. You can be in the right vibration around him. You can speak to him joyfully. Have your brother feel that no matter how he behaves, he’s accepted. Show him by your conversation that you care about him.

At first he probably won’t accept your positive intentions, but we ask you to continue with them anyway. When your brother sees no one is fighting with him, that you accept him, that you allow him to lay around if he wants to, that you don’t preach to him about doing nothing, he’ll eventually get tired of doing these things and begin to raise his vibration and begin to try and find a better way. In doing this and sending him love and light with your thoughts to help him through his difficulties, things will change.

There are many reasons why your brother may have chosen the life he’s currently living. He wants to understand his situation. In the spirit world, where we’ve either experienced a similar life situation in another incarnation, or we’ve seen others go through what we’re going through, we wonder if we can also do that. Can I bring love into that situation? Can I turn that situation around? Do I want to teach things to other people about how to handle this situation and how we all need to reach for love and show love in that situation?

That’s why we choose situations like the one your brother is in. There are many reasons, but the many reasons are unimportant. The main reason is: Am I bringing love into this situation? Am I bringing love and support and positive thoughts to the person who’s going through this difficulty? That’s what’s needed. In spirit we’re all confident we’ll be able to do this. In reality it’s much more difficult. The reason why we came here is to have fun. We came here to face every situation with love. And when you bring love into any situation, it must change.

Bob closes by asking if there’s a possibility of curing this incurable disease. The Council says there’s always this possibility and this, of course, is up to your brother.

Listen to the entire 9-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Peace5 and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it. Or you can ask The Council your own question by typing it into one of the Comment boxes that appear toward the bottom of most of our blog pages.

If you like this post please consider clicking the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.

November 10, 2021 Posted by | Acceptance, Audio Content, Chakras, Channeling, Life Purpose, Love, Meditation, Questions & Answers, Relationships, Spirit, Vibration | , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Why Did My Brother’s Spirit End His Rugby Career with an Injury?

This post answers questions for The Council from a reader named, Phindezwa, who’d like to better understand her role in her younger brother’s life. A few years ago he was injured, which led to the end of his professional rugby career. Since then he’s struggled to find a meaningful career path and I’m currently supporting him, but I want him to be fully independent. Phindezwa asks why her brother’s spirit chose to end his rugby career and experience major difficulties over the last few years.

The Council says your brother’s spirit chose this path to be an example for others. It was pre-planned in spirit for him to have a rugby career he felt good about and to remember how that felt. Then your brother’s spirit wanted him to experience a feeling of failure, to not understand what happened, and not be able to move on. Once that was felt, you chose to be the creative and comforting one. It’s good that you’re playing this comforting role. But when your brother is trying too hard to find another career, almost out of desperation and sadness because that’s not what he wanted in his life, this makes it difficult to bring in this other career.

It’s good for you to talk to your brother as much as possible and share any ideas you and he might have about his new career. He can still have a career in sports if he wants, but not as a professional athlete. He needs to have a feeling of: I experienced the accomplishments I achieved, I believe I created this change in my life, and now there’s something more I can accomplish. There’s something out there that can make me feel even better than I did playing rugby. When he finds this he wants to show people that face the same sort of loss, whether being fired from a job or not finding one, how to go about overcoming this loss.

When your brother is able to pick himself up and try almost anything until the right position comes along, and if he faces everything he tries with the idea of seeing how it goes, and if this isn’t it then it will be something else. Each job leads him closer to what he wants to do. But we suggest somehow your brother keeps looking for work in the area of sports.

Phindezwa asks what her role is in her brother’s life. The Council says it’s to be a supportive person, the one that talks ideas through with him, the one that lifts his spirit, and the one that teaches him he can create whatever he wants. He was good at one thing. Now he’s in a place where he can be great again at something else.

You’re also there to see how your brother’s life is affecting you. Do you like being in the role of a supportive person? What feelings does it bring up in you? Know that you and your brother have pre-planned these experiences in spirit. You’re in the role you desired to experience. You wanted to see how to be supportive and yet step back and let your brother find his own way, but always be there for him. You’ll be showing your brother love and accepting him exactly the way he is. As you accept him and you know there’s a new career for him, he’ll begin to feel that.

As soon as your brother can create independence in his life, it will be there for him.

Listen to the entire 5-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Phindezwa and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it, or ask The Council your own question.

If you like this post please consider clicking the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.

January 29, 2021 Posted by | Acceptance, Audio Content, Career, Channeling, Helping Others, Love, Pre-Incarnation Planning, Questions & Answers, Spirit, You Create Your Reality | , , , , | Leave a comment

Can I Forgive My Brother Without Having Him in My Life?

This post answers questions for The Council from an anonymous reader who says they’ve never had a close relationship with one of their brothers. The Council says you’ve had close relationships in other lifetimes. One of your brother’s lessons was to not be as kind in your current life as you’ve experienced him in a few other lifetimes. One of the things your brother wanted to experience was being difficult and seeing what that feels like. He wants to learn about this and bring it back to spirit.

When your brother became very difficult you agreed in spirit to try and still love him and not find fault with him. One of the lessons for the two of you is forgiveness. He wants to learn to forgive you if you turn away from him. But mostly he wants to forgive himself for not being able to control when he becomes mean or very negative to people. You want to learn to accept him the way he is and be able to forgive him.

The Council says when your brother becomes negative, mean, and unapproachable, which is all part of his lessons and what he chose to experience in this lifetime, his acting out is supposed to show the people around him the state he’s in. This sort of behavior isn’t meant to be about the people he’s insulting or hurting. It’s meant to show the people around him how your brother is hurting inside and how lost he feels. This is just part of the lessons your brother chose this lifetime.

When you’re able to realize your brother’s behavior is a choice he’s making, look at what these choices are teaching you. This was pre-planned in spirit so the people around him would learn how someone who’s hurting doesn’t know how to show love. Your brother tries to hurt others in some way because he hurts so much.

Anonymous says she tries to avoid her brother and say very little to her parents, siblings, and even my husband about him. The Council says this is a good choice.

Anonymous says she knows her brother needs compassion and The Council agrees. She asks if this is something she can do without getting involved in her brother’s life and The Council says of course. Forgiveness starts with understanding your brother is hurting a great deal for many different reasons. You don’t have to put yourself in your brother’s presence and experience this hurt yourself. Send him love, light, and good thoughts that he gets to a place where he can feel comfort. And wish him success in what he needs to experience.

It’s good to remember your brother chose this path. If you want him to change when he hasn’t learned the lesson he planned to learn from behaving the way he does, it would mean you’re trying to stop him on his learning path. Allow your brother to be the way he is. From a distance send him thoughts of success and happiness so he can go through this difficult journey and learn what he wants to experience.

If you can’t send your brother love, you can send him the thought of you forgiving him for hurting you or others. Wish him the joy and happiness of being able to travel this path and learn what he wishes to learn. Or you can send him white light to protect him on his journey to help him stay in touch with his higher self and perhaps find another way to be.

The best way you can send your brother love is to allow him to be the way he is, as hurtful as he is to others and himself. There’s a purpose for his behavior and you’ve all agreed to participate in this. Allowing is the first step of love and forgiving.

Anonymous asks The Council if she and her brother have unfinished business. The Council says the unfinished business is that he wishes to feel love from you and know it’s there, even if you can’t be around him. If you cross paths or speak, always treat him with kindness because he needs this. Remember you agreed in spirit to experience your brother this way in your life. It’s a difficult journey for him and for the people around him. What’s unfinished is for your brother to feel accepted by you, if not now, eventually. This doesn’t mean you need to be around him. You need to learn about forgiveness and allow your brother to be who he is. That’s what you both planned and what remains unfinished.

When you can allow your brother to be who he is, even if he’s not consciously aware of this in his physical form, his higher self will know and allow your brother to somehow know there’s forgiveness and acceptance, even if he’s still not in a good place. Forgive your brother the best you’re currently able.

Anonymous says she worries she’ll marry her brother in her next life. The Council laughs and says this is possible if you choose to. The Council understands you don’t want to be married to him the way he is in your current life, but things would be totally different in a new life.

Anonymous asks The Council what she needs to do to finish her experience of her brother. The Council says to send him love and light. Accept him and know he’s very brave to choose the lesson he’s chosen. He’s having difficulty within himself so when you send him love and light you help him on his path.

Listen to the entire 10-minute audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Anonymous and the rest of us and let us know what you feel about it, or ask your own question.

If you like this post please consider clicking the LIKE button in the section following the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.



August 29, 2020 Posted by | Agreement, Audio Content, Channeling, Choice, Forgiveness, Love, Other Lifetimes, Pre-Incarnation Planning, Questions & Answers, Relationships, Spirit | , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Why Does My Brother Hate Our Parents?

This post answers questions for The Council from a woman who goes by the name, Peace, who asks if her brother has unfinished business from past lives and that he seems to hate their parents. The Council says sometimes this experience of hate comes from the present rather than the past. Perhaps it’s something he saw in another life and decided he wanted to experience it in this lifetime.

Peace asks the reason for her brother’s anger at their parents and sometimes at her. The Council feels Peace’s brother came into this life wanting to experience anger and then be able to find times when he  experiences kindness and understanding. Peace’s role in her brother’s life, which was her pre-birth agreement with him, is to be patient and and understanding of him. Try to express uplifting and loving thoughts to him. By understanding this is something your brother wished to experience you’ll be able to let go of his anger.

Peace asks if she’s supposed to support her brother as a loving sister? The Council says, yes. Your brother wanted to learn about feeling anger he wasn’t able to understand and he needed several people in his life to show him kindness when he felt this anger. As you’re able to show him this kindness, a new understanding will come to him and he’ll begin to see there’s an effort by you and others to be empathetic.

Peace says her brother has an incurable disease and asks why he created this and will he ever overcome it? The Council says there’s a slight possibility her brother will overcome his disease, but he created it as part of what would help him experience anger and not feeling as good as others.

Peace says her brother has a short temper and she’s worried about the person he’ll marry or if he’ll find a suitable wife for himself and be able to stay in this relationship. The Council reminds Peace it’s not her job to worry about a future wife for her brother. Your job is to be understanding, uplifting, and comforting to him.

If your brother creates a life with a wife, and The Council says there’s a slight possibility this will happen, then he’ll need to experience other lessons with his wife. If her brother does take a wife, Peace needs to stand by and watch, not take sides. Send them love and understand whatever they create, whether discord or harmony, it’s part of their pre-birth plan.

Peace says she wants her brother to become a better person and The Council says in order for this to happen she must also become a better person. Become more loving, supporting, uplifting, and understanding. This will help both of you become a better person.

Listen to the entire audio recording of our session with The Council (below) to hear all their guidance for Peace and the rest of us, and let us know what you feel about it. Or ask The Council your own question.

If you like this post, please take a moment to click the LIKE button in the section after the recording to let us and other readers know. Thanks.

August 5, 2019 Posted by | Agreement, Audio Content, Channeling, Pre-Incarnation Planning, Questions & Answers, Relationships, Spirit, You Create Your Reality | , , , , , , , | 2 Comments


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